#i have a lot of thoughts about this au i need to do more with it
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The award for god damn my mouth drop like a cartoon cat goes to SY but u know . I know he doesn’t beat around the bush. However, was I thinking he be like this . And shit I can say from experience and studies that a lot he doing goes right with it. I mean sad thing and it’s really not just one person to pin point who could of fix this besides Thor town folks and trailer trash mom ( now idk where she grew up but hey it’s not me but cliches) that could of help. It’s sad because for her case she probably isn’t a slut while Sy is crazy he just type that knows it but tries to be all wooo man I mean I’m not crazy I’m caring but if u ever mess with me then haha u be getting a dead cat in your mail box or a stalker for life but wooooooo I’m just caring and being a human . Shit pat on the back and you good is looking out a simple box of stuff is looking out non stop poof Sy there is not helping out it’s stalking but bc this town is so small folks won’t see it. Oh he lucky that town size of a city block.
“On pay day, you go down to cash your check then give most of it right back, parsing it out for your various expenses. At the end of it, you have even less than the month before. You don't get it. Thing's only seem to get worse; not just money, but your body” honey this statement so spot on huh one a check back in the day like your time period AU money u get paid can last a month or last time now it’s like a blink poof gone and your body lord I’m only in my 20s and the issues I’m having at my age blown minds.
Sy just always there and idk why but it’s big ( lord I’m drooling and have not finish this thought) well as a whole get always with the sneak attack shit I’m barley 5 foot and I still have issues . Bc I’m too short they turn around and still don’t see me I gotta jump be like Boo. Anyway still damn “. For a big man, he sure can sneak up on you. “ also going back to my girl you got yourself a lifetime 20/20 level stalker. Hahaha way you keep doing Thor I can’t “ It isn't his fault he reminds you of that spoiled deadbeat. “ I wonder still wonder because he hasn’t been front with her which I feel it coming feel it coming . ( still gonna be shock) but on the why he gave her a reason which I’m gonna point out in a second but can “ I don't like to carry 'round debts. Let me buy you one." be one I mean it be least crazy one . And if not does he pray on pregnant women because of well a lot tumblr taught me a lot about kinks but because how easy the target she or how her emotions not there or pregnancy brain. “ You really don't get this man. You're no longer so sure that Thor sent him to check up on you, not since your last interaction. In fact, the wingman seemed more spiteful of him than you” also that he was so close to Thor which questioned his character like so he mad bc what Thor did or he use Thor for some reason. Because in small time I can’t see some friends falling out so easy bc hello who else u got .
This again makes me feel bad for her because while Sy seems nice and it your name was the fluff you don’t ask for I be all aww so cute and romantic but no nothing ever good and sweet it’s an huh my leg said in a sponge bob character voice. Like never so simple and sweet but damn how bad I felt reading this “ You glance over and find Sy watching you as he stands in the queue. His gaze makes you want to wilt.. Not even Thor looked at you like that. Don't be silly. Sy is just being a dutiful guy, helping out the town slut in her time of need. You won't be duped. Not when you can hear your name being twisted on tongues at that very moment” and fact he open ( after 1st day seeing her) mention he read books about pregnancy. It makes her wall slowly start to crack. “ He suggested before he's been reading things about pregnancy. You just can't picture him with a copy of What To Expect When You're Expecting.”
HAAH I’m sure many mention this but lord can you imagine “ He returns with a black coffee and a rather colourful donut. They don't match. Bitter and sweet all at once. “ But no the way that he watches her even down to her fingers. Or what way her EYES 👀 may go. He’s watching her as if I only watching tho his pray but as if he I don’t know still in war zone, looking through his sniper or goggles, watching his enemy. But still huh I hate it the perfect crazy stalker but idk even talking to her not at her or down to her .
AND HE SO HONESTLY BLUNT like okay he playing a game of 1s and 00s and we doing tic tac toe. Still like , “ "Yes, I'd like to take care of you. And the little one, if you'll let me….. His eyes flick up to the ceiling and his cheek ticks as he gives the question genuine thought. When he looks at you again, his face is set, "because I want to." that to me feels ( because not 1st time) he thinking on how to say it like before with the honest but down play it. In away which is why I feel there more.
Called to Duty 4
Warnings: non/dubcon, pregnancy, abandonment, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.
My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.
Characters: Captain Syverson
Summary: You struggle to move on from the biggest mistake of your life but find it hard to forget among the whispers of a small town.
Part of the Backwoods AU
As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.
The bank is as ever anxiety inducing. On pay day, you go down to cash your check then give most of it right back, parsing it out for your various expenses. At the end of it, you have even less than the month before. You don't get it. Thing's only seem to get worse; not just money, but your body. Every day you wake up, you feel even more crummy than the last.
Your hopes of a treat at the cafe are dashed. You give a longing look as you walk by and peer through the window. You can smell cinnamon and coffee. You're strict non-caffeinated, doctor's orders, but a decaf would be amazing with one of those cinnamon buns. Ugh, damn, why are you torturing yourself?
You turn to continue down the street but barely dodge out of the way of another pedestrian. He makes sure you can't pass as he mirrors you, sidestepping to block your way. You sigh as you step back and look Sy in the face. For a big man, he sure can sneak up on you.
"Hey," he flips up his dark sunglasses, "how're you feeling?"
You stare up at him defiantly, not quite bold enough to glare. He hasn't done anything wrong, he's just persistent. It isn't his fault he reminds you of that spoiled deadbeat. Or that your emotions are volatile, one moment teary eyed, the next blazing hot with rage.
"Fine, thanks for asking," you shrug, "Sy, I gotta--"
"I owe you a cookie," he points to the cafe window at his shoulder.
You blink. You remember the cracked shortbread. You forgot about that. The mention of the sugary treat makes your stomach growl and your mouth water.
"No, you don't--"
"I do," he insists, "I don't like to carry 'round debts. Let me buy you one."
"I got it free," you say, "it's not a big deal."
"It is to me," he counters, "I was heading in anyway."
You stare at him. You really don't get this man. You're no longer so sure that Thor sent him to check up on you, not since your last interaction. In fact, the wingman seemed more spiteful of him than you. You look across the steeet to the pharmacy then back at him. The aromas wafting out with each swing of the door have you ravenous.
"I can't stay long, I gotta work," you say.
His cheeks twitch, as if he tamps back a smile before it can bloom, "after you."
He gesture behind you to the door. You turn and lead the way. He reaches past you to open the door before you can and you enter ahead of him. The din within is lively and the air is warm from the crowd and the employees steaming out orders behind the counter.
"Wanna find a seat?" He suggests, "you should rest."
You open your mouth to argue but think better of it. You'd rather not stand in the clustered line. You nod and head off to claim the table by the window. There isn't much left.
You pull out the chair and brace your back as you sit with a sigh. You glance over and find Sy watching you as he stands in the queue. His gaze makes you want to wilt, instead you turn your attention out the window.
Not even Thor looked at you like that. Don't be silly. Sy is just being a dutiful guy, helping out the town slut in her time of need. You won't be duped. Not when you can hear your name being twisted on tongues at that very moment.
You sit and wait, wring the strap of your small purse. You watch the street. If it wasn't for the people, Hammer Ford would be serene.
A plate clinks in front of you and a porcelain mug as well. It isn't a cookie and you can smell the herbal tea's rosy flavour. You peer up at Sy as he gives an apologetic look.
"Cookies are still baking so I got you a cinnamon bun," he says.
"And tea?" You add.
"Can't have one without the other," he says, "no coffee for you."
"Yeah, I... I know."
You could laugh. He suggested before he's been reading things about pregnancy. You just can't picture him with a copy of What To Expect When You're Expecting.
"Thank you," you smile as best you can.
"Gotta get mine, be back," he excuses himself and marches back to the counter.
You look down at the gooey iced draped spiral. You really shouldn't. Not only accept his misspent generosity but indulge in the excess sugar. Yet your hormones won't let you resist. You can at least wait until he's sitting down.
He returns with a black coffee and a rather colourful donut. They don't match. Bitter and sweet all at once. He sits and takes off his hat and sunglasses.
You put your purse to the edge of the table and rest your hand on your stomach, doing your best to resist the animalistic need to tear apart the dessert. His eyes follow the movement and you quickly drop your arm. You don't even think when you do it, it's just a habit.
"You-" he begins.
"Wh--" you find your voice at the same time.
You both stop, hesitant. He nods and gestures to you, lifting his cup as he watches you intently. That's new too. Thor never listened much, only talked a lot. Besides, you weren't exactly together for the conversation.
"Sy," you clear your throat and sit forward as much as you can, "why are you following me around?"
His brows form a vee, "I'm... it's not... I'm tryna help."
"Okay, but why?"
His eyes flick up to the ceiling and his cheek ticks as he gives the question genuine thought. When he looks at you again, his face is set, "because I want to."
"You want to?"
"Yes, I'd like to take care of you. And the little one, if you'll let me."
You can't help your snort, "we hardly know each other."
"Isn't for lack of trying," he taps his fingers on his mug. "Aren't ya gonna try the bun?"
"I will," you assure him. He's trying to distract you and it's close to working. The cinnamon is driving you mad. "A baby is a lot of work and... I'm not your responsibility. I know Thor is your friend."
"Was," he interjects.
"Sure," you accept his decisive declaration, "but that doesn't mean you have to worry about his mistakes."
"Mistakes? I don't think so," he says.
"Well, it's not exactly planned," you scoff, "Sy, really I don't feel right about you doing so much."
"Wouldn't feel right not doing it," he shrugs his burly shoulders.
“But why?” You nearly exclaim. You just want to know why he cares so much, about you?
He leans forward, elbows on the table, “they talk about me too, ya know? Since I got back from... serving. They say I’m f—crazy, or whatever. It wasn’t easy or nothin’ over there but I’m not nuts. Not like they say. Just like you’re not some slut, forgive me for saying it out loud.”
You look down at the table and exhale. So he hears as much as anyone else about you. At least he’s honest. At least he isn’t joining them. You purse your lips and reach for the cinnamon bun, unable to restrain yourself any longer.
“For what it’s worth,” you raise your eyes to meet his, “I never thought you were... unwell, or whatever they say.”
His cheeks pinch, another suppressed smile, and he tilts his head, “I’m only happy to hear you think of me.”
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temptation | lee heeseung pt 2
⟶ summary: having just completed your graduate work in psychotherapy, you’re eager to begin a career as a marriage counselor. you land a job as a counselor at a matchmaking firm for millionaires and meet heeseung, a charismatic client who makes no effort to hide his attraction to you. the only catch is...he’s engaged.
˗ˏˋpairing: billionaire!heeseung x f!reader ❀ genre: marriage counselor au ❀ word count: 19.0k ❀ staring: chisa (22)- xg, yunho(23)- ateez, jaehyun(22)- bnd, heeseung (23) + jake (22) + jay (22) + sunghoon (22)- enhypen, sakura (24)- le sserafim, karina (24)- aespa, danielle (20)- new jeans. ⟶ warnings:mentions of anxiety and depression, therapy speak, lots of swearing, cheating, soft dom!hee, sub!reader, oral (f + m receiving), p in v intercourse, protected sex, dirty talk, praise, brief breast play, fingering, vanillaish sex, slight body worship, talk about childhood trauma, consumption of alcohol, mentions of abortion (not reader), invasion of privacy, inappropriate relationship dynamics, talk of assisted living, mention of a suicide attempt, allusions of starving yourself, mentions of anti- depressants, vague talk of ptsd, mentions of verbal abuse, heeseung doesn’t have good parents, physical altercation, online bullying (knets have a field day with u), heeseung is v insecure and has some emotional trauma. please let me know if i’ve missed anything!
✎୭: the full version, uninterrupted can be found on my ao3 here. thank you so much for reading this monster of a fic! i love and appreciate every single one of you!
SATURDAY FEBRUARY 22ND, 2025
It’s been a week since the kiss. A week since everything spiraled out of control.
You’ve been rotting away in your bed, hidden beneath blankets like a child hiding from monsters only this time, the monster isn’t under your bed—it’s in your chest, clawing at your heart every time you think about him.
The first thing you did the morning after was log into your work account and cash in some of your sick days. You needed a way to avoid the office, a way to avoid him. Dani emailed you a few small assignments, things you could complete from home so it was easy to play the role of someone mildly under the weather. A few sniffles over the phone and vague mentions of a stomach bug and Miss Min didn’t even question it.
Sakura still being in Japan has worked to your advantage. With her busy filming schedule, the usual meetings and updates have been sparse. Miss Min has been surprisingly lenient, perhaps assuming that you’re taking this time to recover before things pick up again.
But you’re not recovering. If anything, you’re unraveling.
You haven’t stepped out of your apartment in days, let alone made an attempt to eat properly or take care of yourself. The bare minimum—replying to work emails and completing small tasks—is the only thing tethering you to reality.
You know you’re running out of time. Eventually, Miss Min will expect you back in the office and when that day comes, you’ll have no choice but to face the truth. You’ll have to tell her to reassign Heeseung and Sakura’s case to someone else.
The thought of it paralyzes you. Once you remove yourself, that’s it. You’ll have no reason to see him anymore. No excuse to hear his voice or watch the way he absentmindedly taps his pen against the desk during meetings. No more pretending that you’re just doing your job when deep down, you know you’ve already failed at keeping your feelings in check.
Heeseung hasn’t reached out. Not once. No calls, no texts, no emails. Nothing.
It shouldn’t hurt this much. You’re the one who left his home without a word, too embarrassed to face what you’d done. You’re the one who’s been avoiding him like the plague hoping that the distance will make it easier to let go. But his silence feels like a confirmation of your worst fear—that he regrets everything.
The memory of that night replays in your mind on a loop. The way his lips felt against yours, the way he held you, the way he took care of you.
It’s torture, and you’ve trapped yourself in it.
Your friends have noticed, of course. How could they not?
It started with Yunho.
He texted a few days ago, saying he’d made a big batch of jjajangmyeon and that you should come over for dinner. Normally, you’d jump at the chance to eat anything Yunho cooked—he has a talent for cooking. But you declined claiming you weren’t feeling well.
His reply was immediate.
5:25pm | yuyu💫: u never turn down food…are you sure ur okay?
You typed out a response. Deleted it. Typed out another. Deleted that one too. Finally, you settled on:
5:36 pm | you: i’m fine. just tired. thanks for the offer.
Then there was Jaehyun.
He called the following evening, his tone light and casual. “Hey, want to grab drinks after my shift? It’s been a while since we caught up.”
Normally, you’d agree in a heartbeat. Jaehyun’s presence was easy and comforting, and nights out with him always left you feeling lighter but the thought of facing anyone, even someone as laid-back as Jaehyun, felt impossible.
“I’m not in the mood,” you said, your voice quieter than usual.
“Not in the mood for drinks?” he repeated, his tone disbelieving. “Since when?”
You forced a weak laugh. “Rain check?”
He didn’t press, but the concern in his voice lingered long after the call ended.
Finally, there was Chisa.
She didn’t bother with subtlety. One afternoon, she stormed into your room, keys in hand. “Get dressed,” she said firmly. “We’re going to the mall.”
You blinked at her from your cocoon of blankets, confused and slightly annoyed. “I’m good,” you muttered, burrowing deeper into your bed.
“I’ll buy you makeup,” she added, a note of bribery in her voice. “Whatever you want.”
Normally, you’d jump at the offer. You loved makeup, and free makeup was even better. But the idea of standing under bright store lights, pretending to be okay, was unbearable.
“I already have more than enough makeup,” you said, turning away.
Chisa didn’t argue. She just stood there for a moment, watching you with an expression that made your chest ache, before leaving the room without another word.
That was two days ago. It’s now past midday and you’re still in bed. The room is dark, save for the faint light filtering through the curtains. Your stomach growls but you don’t have the energy to cook let alone eat.
You’re about to close your eyes again when the door to your room bursts open.
“What the—?” You sit up abruptly, squinting against the sudden intrusion.
Your friends stand in the doorway, each of them wearing expressions ranging from concern to frustration.
“What are you doing?” you ask, your voice hoarse from disuse.
Jaehyun strides forward without answering, grabbing the edge of your blanket.
“Jaehyun!” you protest, clutching the fabric tightly. “What are you doing?”
“Taking care of you since you clearly can’t do it yourself,” he snaps, his voice sharper than you’re used to.
“Stop it!” You tug back on the blanket, growing annoyed but Jaehyun doesn’t let go.
“Hey, hey,” Yunho interjects, stepping between the two of you. “Let’s all calm down.” He turns to you, his voice softer. “We’re just worried about you. You haven’t seemed like yourself lately.”
You sigh, wrapping your arms around yourself. “I’m fine, just—”
“Sick,” Chisa interrupts, crossing her arms. “Yeah, we know. That’s what you want us to believe.”
Jaehyun scoffs. “You rarely missed a day of class in college, even if you were sick so excuse me if we’re not buying that excuse this time.”
You stare at them blankly unsure of how to respond.
Chisa steps closer, kneeling in front of you. Her voice is gentle as she says, “We’re just worried about you, ____. This isn’t… normal. Please, just tell us what’s going on so we can help.”
Tears sting your eyes, but you blink them away. “I just needed a week off. I’ll be okay.”
Yunho sits beside you on the bed, his presence warm. “We can’t force you to talk about something you’re clearly not ready to share,” he says. “But at least let us help you.”
Jaehyun sighs, his frustration melting as he sees the tears threatening to fall. “We don’t have to talk about it. We can just order takeout and binge-watch early 2000s shows… just stop icing us out. Please. We love you and want to help you.”
The dam breaks.
You start crying, the sound raw and unrestrained. Your friends don’t say anything—they just surround you, pulling you into a group hug.
Yunho is the first to pull away, sniffling quietly as he stands. “I’ll order the food,” he says, his voice thick with emotion.
Jaehyun follows, mumbling something about not wanting to cry in front of you.
Chisa stays, holding you until your sobs subside. She rubs your back soothingly and says, “Whatever it is, know that you’ll overcome it.”
You nod weakly, more out of instinct than belief. Deep down, you don’t think you’ll overcome this—not when “this” is Lee Heeseung. How could you possibly move on from him?
You don’t think you’ve ever felt this way about anyone before. It’s not just the heartbreak—it’s the way he made you feel so seen. You’ve spent so much of your life hiding parts of yourself, keeping your scars neatly tucked away but Heeseung made it feel safe to let them show.
Most people don’t know why you became a marriage counselor. You’ve always lied whenever the question came up, saying you “just love love,” but the truth is messier and darker. Your father’s infidelity, your mother’s quiet suffering and your own helplessness in the face of it all shaped you. You wanted to help people in ways you couldn’t help her. But it’s not something you ever talk about—not until Heeseung.
He was the first person outside of your friends whom you willingly opened up to. The first person you wanted to open up to. And when you did, his response wasn’t pity or judgment. It was understanding. He didn’t tell you to move on or let it go. He simply listened, offering quiet reassurances. His words didn’t just soothe your present self…they reached that fractured little girl you used to be, the one who just wanted someone to tell her it wasn’t her fault.
And Heeseung… he understood because he’d been there too. Despite living in the aftermath of his brother’s attempted suicide, enduring his father’s suffocating demands and his mother’s overbearing love, he hadn’t become some cold-hearted monster. He had every reason to, but he didn’t.
Sure, he has his flaws. He’s scared of vulnerability, keeps people at arm’s length and hides behind a playboy persona. But you see through it—it’s all armor. He doesn’t want people to see the cracks, to know he has weaknesses they could exploit. And yet with you, he tore all those walls down. He let you see the version of himself that never got to exist when he was younger.
The version he even hides now.
You’d give anything to make sure he’s never hurt again. To ensure he never has to hide or water himself down. To guarantee he can just be himself—happy, unburdened and free. But you can’t.
Because you’re not from his world. You’re not the person he’s supposed to choose. And even if you were, some part of you thinks this love—this all-consuming love—might be too much. Too much for Heeseung.
But not because he doesn’t deserve it. No, Heeseung deserves the kind of love that heals, that lets him breathe, that doesn’t ask for anything he can’t give. But it’s the weight of it, the enormity of what it would mean to truly care for someone like him that gives you pause.
You haven’t forgotten about him forcing his ex-girlfriend to get an abortion, it’s stuck with you since you overheard it. You never brought it up, never asked Heeseung to clarify but it lingers. It colors how you see him, even if you don’t want it to. You don’t believe Heeseung is the kind of man who would demand something so cruel, so selfish but the seed of doubt is there. And it terrifies you.
Because if you’re wrong, if he really did that, what does that say about him? About you for wanting to believe in him so badly?
But even without knowing the truth, you can feel how carefully Heeseung treads around the idea of vulnerability. It’s in the way he deflects, the way he keeps people at a distance, the way his sharp words mask the pain he doesn’t think anyone notices. Loving someone like that would require patience…endless patience and you’re not sure if even that would be enough.
Heeseung doesn’t halfass anything, he said so himself. He doesn’t know how to. If he let himself fall for you, it would be all-encompassing. Consuming. He would give you everything he has, every vulnerable piece of himself he’s spent years hiding away. And that’s what scares you. Not that he wouldn’t love you enough, but that he’d love you too much.
That kind of love comes with expectations, with vulnerabilities Heeseung might not be ready to face. It’s one thing for him to care for someone in theory, to keep his emotions safely compartmentalized, but to truly open himself up? To risk that kind of pain again? You’re not sure he can.
And then there’s the other part, the part you don’t want to admit even to yourself: what if it’s not enough? What if you’re not enough? What if he gives you everything and you still can’t reach him? What if the walls he’s built are so strong that even love can’t break them down?
So you hesitate. Not because you don’t want him, but because you do. Because the thought of not being enough for him is unbearable.
You lean into Chisa’s embrace, letting the tears spill over again silent now but no less heavy. The weight of it all, the longing, the guilt, the hopelessness—feels unbearable.
You don’t think you’ll ever overcome Lee Heeseung.
Chisa helps you out of bed and into the living room, where Yunho pats the spot next to him on the couch. You sit between him and Chisa, feeling their warmth on either side.
Chisa boots up the TV, scrolling through the options. “How far away is the food?” she asks.
“Another twenty minutes,” Yunho replies, checking his phone.
Jaehyun comes into the living room, handing you a bottle of water. You smile softly and thank him. He nods, taking a seat beside Yunho.
Chisa selects That’s So Raven and hits play. As the theme song fills the room, you glance around at your friends, your heart swelling with gratitude.
You don’t deserve them.
But as you sit there, surrounded by their love and support, you realize you can’t keep this from them forever. You’ll tell them about Heeseung—once you’ve removed yourself from the case.
For now, you let yourself enjoy the moment knowing it might be the last bit of peace you have before everything falls apart again.
THAT SAME DAY ON THE OTHER SIDE OF TOWN
The ball bounces high off the court, cutting cleanly through the crisp afternoon air. Jay slams it back toward Jake and Heeseung’s side with enough force to make Jake grunt, barely managing to return it. It ricochets toward Heeseung—his racket is raised and ready, but his reaction time is too slow. The ball whizzes past him, landing well within the lines.
Jay pumps his fist triumphantly. “Another point for us!”
Jake groans, marching toward Heeseung with his racket pointed accusingly. “Yah! What’s wrong with you? We’re losing!” His aussie accent is stronger than ever, laced with the kind of playful exasperation only a best friend can get away with.
Jay and Sunghoon dissolve into laughter at Jake’s fiery outburst. It’s Sunghoon’s first time joining their tennis matches—Jake had invited him earlier that week, saying, “He fits the vibe, trust me.” And so far, Sunghoon had been keeping up, much to Jay’s delight and Jake’s annoyance.
“Sorry,” Heeseung mutters, rubbing the back of his neck. “My head’s… everywhere today.”
“Yeah well get it together!” Jake huffs, gesturing dramatically with his racket. “We’re not losing to these two.”
“Hey!” Jay protests, offended. “These two are crushing you.”
Sunghoon smirks as he twirls his racket. “Not my fault Heeseung’s got his head in the clouds.”
Jake groans, pushing Heeseung toward his side of the court. “Come on man! Get out of your head and play!”
Heeseung exhales heavily, adjusting his stance to serve. He tosses the ball into the air, his focus sharpening as he swings his racket. The ball zips across the net, hitting the opposite side perfectly.
As the game resumes, Heeseung speaks, his voice low but clear: “I made out with my therapist.”
Jay misses his swing completely, the ball bouncing away. Sunghoon whistles in surprise. Jake freezes, staring at Heeseung like he’s grown a second head.
“You what?” Jake finally blurts out.
Heeseung shrugs, keeping his expression neutral even as a knot tightens in his chest. “You heard me.”
Sunghoon fiddles with his racket, clearly intrigued. “Well, this just got interesting.”
Jake recovers first, shaking his head. “Wait, wait. Back up. How did that happen?”
Heeseung exhales, running a hand through his hair. “It’s a long story.”
“We’ve got time,” Jay says, walking over to grab the ball.
Heeseung hesitates, but when he sees the curiosity—and concern—in their faces, he decides to tell them everything. “Okay, so you know how my parents forced me to go to that matchmaking firm?”
Jay snorts. “Forced is putting it lightly.”
“Exactly,” Heeseung mutters. “They were tired of the tabloids making me look like a… well, you know.”
“A whore,” Jake supplies helpfully.
“Thank you, Jake,” Heeseung says dryly before continuing. “Anyway, I wasn’t taking it seriously at first. But then I met her—____. She’s one of their counselors. The minute I walked into that consultation room and saw her…” He pauses, the memory of that moment flickering in his mind. “She wasn’t like anyone I’d ever met. She was professional but kind. She didn’t look at me like I was some project to fix. Didn’t associate me with what the news was saying….she just… listened.”
Jay raises an eyebrow. “Listened?”
“Yeah.” Heeseung nods. “Like, really listened. I don’t think anyone’s ever done that before. Not the way she did.”
The game pauses as the four of them linger on Heeseung’s words. Jake twists his racket, visibly intrigued. “So, what happened?”
Heeseung shifts uncomfortably. “We had dinner last week…don’t ask…She didn’t judge me. Didn’t push. We talked about everything—work, family, life… even stuff I don’t usually talk about…like Heejoon.”
Sunghoon frowns. “Who’s Heejoon?”
Heeseung hesitates before explaining, “My brother. He lives in an assisted living facility.” His voice is quieter now, tinged with a sadness he doesn’t often show.
Jake and Jay exchange a look. They’ve known about Heejoon for years but they also know how rarely Heeseung brings him up.
“She didn’t pry,” Heeseung continues. “She just… let me talk. And when I didn’t want to talk, she let me sit in silence. Do you know how rare that is?”
Jake whistles softly. “Sounds like she really gets you.”
“Yeah,” Heeseung says, almost to himself. “She does.”
Jay watches him closely, his expression thoughtful. “It sounds like you like her.”
Heeseung’s grip tightens on the racket, his jaw clenching. The idea strikes a nerve, one he’s not ready to confront. He tried to ignore his feelings when they first started surfacing—during that one-on-one meeting at the hotel bar.
He brushed it off as professional interest, convinced himself it was just admiration for your work. But then you started slipping into his thoughts more often than he liked to admit.
And now, standing with his friends on this tennis court, the reality of it feels inescapable.
He doesn’t want to like you. The idea terrifies him. Liking you would mean opening himself up and he’s learned the hard way what happens when he lets someone in. Vulnerability is a risk he’s not sure he’s willing to take again. It’s safer to keep things on the surface, where emotions can’t dig too deep, where people can’t get close enough to hurt him.
But this… this feels different.
The way you listen to him without judgment, the way you genuinely seem to care—it’s unlike anything he’s experienced in years. You don’t expect him to be the perfect son, the unshakable CEO, or the carefree charmer everyone else sees. You let him be Heeseung—messy, flawed, and real. And somehow, that’s scarier than anything else.
"I don’t like her," Heeseung replies, his tone sharper than he intended. "It’s not like that."
Jay shrugs, setting up another serve. "Hate the message, not the messenger."
The ball flies across the net, but the tension remains. Jake eventually breaks the silence. "Okay, but Jay’s right. This is the most attention we’ve seen you willingly give someone since... well, you know." He stops abruptly, glancing at Jay as the ball falls flat in front of Sunghoon.
Jay glares. “Don’t.”
“What?” Jake says innocently. “I didn’t say her name.”
Sunghoon frowns, looking between them. “Who are we talking about?”
Heeseung exhales heavily, his shoulders sagging. "You can say her name. It’s not the end of the world."
Jake takes it upon himself to explain, filling Sunghoon in as they continue their game. "Heeseung dated this girl, Karina, back in college. She was the first person who got through to him during his...experimental phase." He dodges a stray ball from Heeseung before continuing. "He actually wanted to be monogamous with her."
Sunghoon raises an eyebrow, surprised. Jay adds, "Shocking, I know."
Sunghoon serves, the ball whizzing over the net. "So, what happened?"
Heeseung remains silent, his jaw tightening. Jake picks up where he left off. "Heeseung was still... figuring things out and Karina got self-conscious about all the attention their relationship got."
Jay continues, his tone more measured. “It wasn’t just the attention. Karina was…insecure. Heseung was the only person she had ever been with, but she wasn’t his first anything. All those other girls he’d been with? It got in her head. She started wondering if she was good enough.”
Sunghoon nods slowly. “So what, she wanted a break?”
“Yeah,” Jay says. “She said she needed to figure out what she really wanted. Heeseung knew what that meant but he didn’t think she’d actually sleep with someone else.”
Jake takes over, his tone blunt. “She got pregnant by another guy.”
Sunghoon’s jaw drops. “Seriously?”
Jay snickers. “And lover boy over there,” he tilts his head in Heeseungs direction as he prepares to serve, “didn’t care, he offered to help her raise the baby.”
Jake bursts out laughing, striking the ball back. “The dad that stepped up!”
Heeseung rolls his eyes. “Very funny.”
Sunghoon studies him quietly. “So… what happened?”
“She said it wouldn’t be fair to me,” Heeseung says quietly. “That I deserved more than being tied down to someone else’s mistake. So we ended things.”
Jake adds, “But her friends didn’t see it that way. They told everyone Heeseung dumped her because she wouldn’t get an abortion. People thought the baby was his. Karina transferred schools to get away from the mess.”
Sunghoon whistles, shaking his head. “That’s… a lot.”
“Yeah,” Jake says. “We had to pick up the mess she left behind. Heeseung was a wreck.”
Jay nods. "It was a mess. Heeseung didn’t bother correcting the narrative. He figured it was better to let people hate him if it meant they’d leave Karina alone."
Heeseung fixes his gaze on Jay’s new serve but his mind is far away. Jake’s words echo in his head dredging up memories he’s tried to bury.
It all started so innocently. Karina had crashed into him in the hallway outside their dorm rooms, her lab manual and papers went flying across the floor. She was in such a rush, barely looking at him as she muttered a quick “sorry” and darted off after Heeseung helped pick up her notes. He’d laughed it off at the time, figuring she was just another busy college student.
But then he started noticing her more. She was his next-door neighbor after all. He saw her leaving for early classes, hair in a messy ponytail, coffee cup in hand. He caught glimpses of her in the common areas, always with her head buried in a textbook or her laptop.
The first real conversation they had was late one night when he came back from a party. She was in the dorm lounge, slumped over her laptop, tears streaming down her face. He didn’t even know why he’d stopped—normally, he would’ve just kept walking. But something about the way she looked so defeated and alone made him pause.
He found out she was locked out of her room, freezing, starving, and overwhelmed by a cell bio lab report she had no idea how to write. Heeseung hadn’t planned to stay. He told himself he was just being nice when he ordered Mexican food for them and offered up his room for her to work in. But as the hours passed, as he stayed up helping her find sources and cracking jokes to make her laugh, something shifted.
That night, he realized he wanted to see her again. And he did—again and again. Their friendship grew and somewhere along the way he fell for her. Hard.
He didn’t even notice at first. It wasn’t one big moment, but a series of small ones: the way she’d scrunch her nose when she was concentrating, how her laughter lit up a room, the way she listened when he talked, like he was the most interesting person in the world. Heeseung started skipping parties, hanging out with her instead. For the first time in a long time, he didn’t feel the need to impress anyone or put on a front. He could just be himself.
When they started dating, it felt like a dream. But dreams don’t last.
Karina wasn’t like him—she wasn’t used to the attention, the whispers, the gossip. His past flings made it worse, their snarky comments and passive-aggressive stares feeding her insecurities. He tried to reassure her, to show her she was the only one who mattered, but it wasn’t enough.
When she asked for a break Heeseung gave her space even though it tore him apart. He told himself she’d come back, that they’d work things out. Heeseung still remembers the night she told him. She’d shown up at his door, tears in her eyes, her hands shaking. He thought she was there to reconcile, to tell him she was ready to try again. Instead, she told him about the baby.
He could’ve walked away. A part of him wanted to. But the love he felt for her, the kind that makes you want to stay even when it hurts—kept him rooted in place.
Heeseung argued and pleaded but she wouldn’t budge. She told him she loved him too much to let him sacrifice his future for her mistakes.
When the rumors started—that the baby was his and he’d dumped her because she wouldn’t get an abortion—Heeseung didn’t correct them. What was the point?
She transferred schools soon after, and that was the end of it. The end of them.
Heeseung exhales sharply, his chest stinging at the memory. He’s not in love with Karina anymore, he knows that. But what they had, how it ended, left scars he’s still dealing with.
She was his first love, the first person he let himself be vulnerable with and she left.
Now, the idea of letting someone in like that again terrifies him. What if they leave too? What if he’s not enough?
Sunghoon glances at Heeseung, who is unusually quiet. The tabloids had painted a picture of him as a careless playboy, but this version of Heeseung—reserved, contemplative—didn’t fit that image. As Heeseung serves again, Sunghoon’s perspective shifts. Heeseung isn’t aloof; he’s guarded, carrying the weight of past scars and unspoken emotions.
“Point is,” Jay finally says, breaking the silence, “you deserve to be happy, Heeseung. And it sounds like this girl—____, makes you happy. Maybe it’s worth giving it a shot.”
Heeseung’s grip on his racket tightens, his gaze distant. “I know. But that’s what scares me.”
Jay frowns. “Why?”
Heeseung hesitates, then sighs. “Because people like her don’t exist in my world. Genuine, kind… It’s easier to push her away than risk losing her.”
The silence stretches between them as the weight of his words settles.
Jake tilts his head, his voice uncharacteristically serious. “What’s worse? Losing her because you didn’t try, or losing her after you gave it your all?”
Jay nods, his expression softening. “Whatever makes you happy, man. You’ve spent years doing what everyone else wants. Maybe it’s time to focus on what you want. You deserve to be happy.”
Heeseung looks at Jay, his jaw clenching as he processes his friend’s words. He knows they’re right. They always are. But admitting what he wants—admitting that he wants you—is the hardest part.
Sunghoon, who has been quietly observing, finally speaks. “You should go for it, man. You’re right, there aren’t a lot of genuine people in our world but it sounds like you’ve found someone who cares about you...why pass that up?”
Jake grins, the humor creeping back into his tone. “Plus, she’s a therapist. I’m sure she can help you sort through those deep-seated mommy and daddy issues.”
Heeseung snorts, shaking his head. “Fuck off.”
As they pack up their equipment, Heeseung lingers, his mind replaying the events of the past week. The kiss, the way you’d looked at him, the vulnerability in your eyes—it had all felt so real. But the morning after, you were gone. No explanation, no goodbye. Just... gone.
He remembers waking up, hoping to talk things out, to figure out what the kiss meant for both of you. He’d wanted to kiss you again, to tell you that he didn’t regret it. But your absence had said it all. You regretted it. You didn’t want him.
That’s why he hadn’t reached out. He’d convinced himself that you needed space, that pushing you would only make things worse. But now, after hearing his friends, he’s starting to question that logic. Maybe he’s been using your disappearance as an excuse to protect himself. Maybe it’s time to take a risk.
As the sun sets, Heeseung sits in his car, gripping the steering wheel tightly. The echoes of Jay’s words ring in his ears: "You deserve to be happy."
For the first time in days, he pulls out his phone, his fingers hovering over your contact. His heart pounds as he considers what to say, what to do. He doesn’t call—not yet—but the decision is made. He’s going to reach out. He’s going to try.
Because Jay is right: he deserves to be happy, and maybe you’re the person who can help him find that happiness.
MONDAY FEBRUARY 24TH, 2025
You’re standing in front of the glass doors to your office building clutching your bag with both hands as if it might slip away and drag you with it. The week you took off feels like a fever dream now—blurry and surreal but undeniably real in the toll it’s taken on your body and mind. You’ve barely slept, barely eaten, and every fiber of your being wants to turn around and leave. But you can’t.
You exhale shakily, willing your feet to move. The lobby is bustling as usual—faces you don’t recognize weaving in and out, some rushing to catch elevators, others lingering by the café for their first caffeine hit of the day.
For a moment, you imagine Jaehyun here, waiting in the corner like he offered. He had insisted on accompanying you today, his day off but you turned him down. “I’ll be fine,” you’d said, more to convince yourself than him. The truth is, you don’t feel fine. Not even close.
Your resolve wavers as you step into the elevator, but you clutch your bag tighter and remind yourself of your plan. Drop off your things, go straight to Miss Min and request to be removed from the case. That’s it. That’s all you have to do. You don’t have any sessions today so you’re free to do paperwork in the comfort of your office alone.
The elevator dings, the doors sliding open to reveal the familiar hallway. Your heart pounds harder with each step, dread clawing at your chest.
The firm feels unfamiliar after just a week away. You round the corner to your office but stop dead in your tracks.
Sakura is standing there, waiting for you. The sight of her sends your heart plummeting into your stomach.
Her outfit is immaculate as always, a Dior top tucked into high-waisted jeans, a fluffy tote bag slung over one shoulder. She looks stunning, almost as if she just stepped out of a magazine spread.
What is she doing here?
You don’t have a scheduled meeting with her today and the possibilities racing through your mind only make the anxiety worse. Did Heeseung tell her about the kiss? Is she here to confront you?
You swallow hard and force a polite smile, hoping it doesn’t look as strained as it feels. “Sakura, hi. What brings you here?”
Her smile is warm and genuine, completely disarming. “I finally found an opening in my schedule,” she says. “I know it’s last minute and I’m sorry but I really wanted to have that one-on-one time with you.”
Your heart sinks further.
Oh.
She’s not here to accuse you of anything. She’s here because she thinks you’re someone she can trust.
Staring into her kind eyes feels unbearable knowing what you’ve done.
“Oh, um…” You hesitate, glancing at the door to your office. “Actually, I don’t… I can’t today. I’m sorry. I don’t have time.”
You try to sidestep her, desperate to escape into the relative safety of your office but Sakura gently places a hand on your arm, stopping you.
“I’m sorry,” she says softly, her tone almost pleading. “I really don’t mean to impose, but this is my only free day off. Please?”
There’s something so sincere in her voice, something that twists the knife of guilt even deeper. You have no right to deny her this. It’s quite literally the least you could do.
You nod reluctantly, forcing a small smile. “Okay. What did you have in mind?”
Sakura’s face lights up as she lifts her tote bag slightly. “Crocheting! I brought some of my materials.”
You smile softly remembering her mentioning it was a hobby of hers. “Crocheting?”
“Yeah!” she says, her excitement palpable. “I thought it might be a fun way for us to spend time together.”
“Sure,” you say quietly, nodding toward your office. “We can work in here. We’ll have it to ourselves.”
You lead her inside, offering her the seat across from your desk. She immediately starts unpacking her supplies—rolls of yarn in soft pastels, a variety of hooks, and a pattern book.
“Have you ever crocheted before?” she asks, glancing up at you with a smile.
You shake your head. “No, never.”
Sakura grins. “Perfect. I’ll teach you the basics.”
She’s patient as she explains each step, showing you how to hold the hook and yarn, how to make a simple chain. Her enthusiasm is infectious and for a brief moment you almost forget the fact that you kissed her fiancée.
When she hands you a pattern she’s already started—a small flower, you thank her and begin carefully following her instructions. Meanwhile, she starts on a new project.
“What are you making?” you ask after a while, glancing at the soft gray yarn in her hands.
“A scarf,” she says, her voice light. “It’s getting colder, and I want Heeseung to stay warm.”
Your hands falter, the hook slipping from your fingers. You force yourself to recover quickly, pretending to focus on the flower in your lap.
“Do you…” You hesitate, your voice barely above a whisper. “Do you have feelings for him?”
Sakura blushes, her fingers pausing for a moment before resuming their work. “I know it probably sounds stupid because, well, why would the ‘perfect princess’ want the messed-up playboy?”
She sighs, her voice soft and contemplative. “I don’t know. I can’t help but like him.”
You nod slowly, understanding all too well how easy it is to fall for Heeseung, especially when he lets his guard down.
“You don’t have to rationalize why you like him,” you say quietly.
Sakura smiles faintly, her gaze focused on her work. “I see myself in him, you know? Spending your whole life in the spotlight…it forces you to become someone else. I see that with Heeseung. He hides so much of himself but I know there’s more to him than what he lets people see.”
You nod again, unsure of what to say. The conversation feels like walking a tightrope.
Sakura continues, her voice softer now. “I think he’s very guarded. He keeps me at a distance but I believe if we keep working with you, he’ll learn to open up. He can be a good husband, I know he can.”
Her words hit you like a punch to the gut. You have no doubt either that Heeseung would make an amazing husband. You swallow the lump in your throat and force a small smile. “You’re…good at seeing the best in people.”
She looks up at you, her expression thoughtful. “Do you think that’s a bad thing?”
“No,” you say quickly looking back at the flower. “But…do you think you like him for who he is now, or for who you think he could be?”
Sakura tilts her head, considering your question. “Can’t it be both? Can’t I like him and also want to help him become the best version of himself?”
You hesitate, your fingers tightening around the yarn in your lap. “Maybe. But sometimes, when we try to ‘fix’ someone, we end up falling for the version of them we’ve created in our heads, not the person they really are.”
You don’t know why you’re saying this—or maybe you do. Maybe it’s because you’ve seen the real Heeseung. There’s no need for you to imagine who he is or who he could become because you know. You know his flaws, his frustrations, the way his voice sharpens when he’s annoyed, and how his smile softens when he talks about the things that matter to him. And despite all of it—no, because of all of it….you still like him.
Heeseung doesn’t need fixing. He deserves to be loved unconditionally, not molded into someone else’s ideal.
You glance at Sakura. She doesn’t seem like the type to love with limits. She’s earnest, kind, and patient in a way you’ve never been. If Heeseung allowed himself to get to know her, you could see them being happy together. She would lay her life down to ensure his happiness.
But you?
You’d let the world burn if it meant keeping him safe. You’d tear the universe apart just to put him back together.
It’s an unbearable truth, one you wish you could erase from yourself because no matter how much you care for him, you know that it’s unfair to Sakura.
Sakura nods slowly, her gaze distant. “I guess that’s something I’ll have to figure out. But…I care about him. And I want to see him happy, whether that’s with me or not.”
“Do you mean it?” you ask hesitantly.
Sakura looks up, confused. “Mean what?”
“When you say you wouldn’t mind if Heeseung chose someone else,” you clarify. “Do you really mean that?”
Her fingers pause mid-stitch, and she looks thoughtful. “It would hurt,” she admits. “I’ve come to care about him but I think we both deserve to be with someone who loves us completely. Don’t you?”
You nod slowly.
“I believe he could be that person for me,” Sakura continues, her voice soft. “But if he isn’t, I won’t force it. I’ve spent too much of my life trying to fit into roles that weren’t meant for me. I deserve someone who loves me for who I am and so does he.”
“Thank you,” you say softly, your voice barely audible.
“For what?”
“For trusting me with this.” You respond.
Sakura smiles warmly. “You’re easy to talk to. I can see why Heeseung respects you so much.”
You lower your gaze, unable to meet her eyes. “I’m just doing my job.”
The conversation drifts back to lighter topics as you continue crocheting, but the weight of your guilt never leaves. When the hour is up, you see Sakura out and close the door behind her and lean against it, exhaling shakily. You need to remove yourself.
Crossing the room, you settle into your chair and reach for the files neatly stacked on your desk. Your fingers tremble as you sift through the documents; session notes, progress reports, everything you’ve meticulously prepared over the past month for Heeseung and Sakura.
This was supposed to be just another assignment, your first major case as part of the matchmaking firm’s elite team. You were supposed to help them establish trust, lay the groundwork for a successful marriage and ensure the media viewed them as the perfect couple. But somewhere along the way, it became personal.
You can’t do this anymore. Not when you’ve crossed lines you swore you wouldn’t. Not when you’ve let yourself feel things you shouldn’t.
Gathering the files into a tidy stack, you take a deep breath and stand. You’ll bring these to Miss Min and request to be removed from the case. It’s the only way to salvage what’s left of your integrity and maybe even your sanity.But before you can take a step, there’s a knock at your door.
“Come in.”
The door opens to reveal Dani with a bright smile plastered across her face. She steps inside, holding a clipboard in one hand and a tablet in the other.
“Hey, just the person I was looking for!” she says cheerfully.
You blink, setting the files back down on your desk. “What’s up?”
“Miss Min wanted me to stop by and let you know something,” Dani says, her tone chipper. “She saw Sakura in your office earlier and said you’ve been doing a great job with this case. And since there hasn’t been any bad press with Heeseung lately, she thinks tomorrow’s the perfect day to announce their engagement!”
The words hit you like a freight train. Tomorrow.
You knew this day was coming—it’s what you’ve been working toward. But now that it’s here, the reality of it is suffocating. You force yourself to nod. “That’s…great news.”
Dani’s smile widens. “I know, right? This was your first major case and you killed it! Miss Min is definitely going to put you in charge of more high-profile clients after this.”
“Yeah,” you say quietly, the word feeling hollow. “I’m happy.”
Dani doesn’t seem to notice the strain in your voice. She beams at you one last time before turning to leave but then she pauses and looks back over her shoulder.
“Oh, and Miss Min said you’ve earned a day off tomorrow. Just be on standby in case Heeseung or Sakura need anything.”
You nod again, managing a faint smile. “Thanks for letting me know.”
“No problem! Enjoy your night!” Dani chirps before disappearing out the door.
The moment she’s gone, you sink back into your chair, the files still sitting in front of you. Tomorrow. It feels like a death sentence.
You’re supposed to be proud of yourself, supposed to feel accomplished for guiding Heeseung and Sakura to this point. But all you feel is empty.
Your gaze drifts to your phone on the desk and as if on cue, the screen lights up with a text notification.
9:12 am | heeseung: hey, can we talk?9:14 am | heeseung: please come over tonight.
Your heart pounds as you stare at the messages. You know what you should do. You should say no, maintain the little professional boundaries left and keep your distance. You should focus on preparing yourself for tomorrow, for the inevitable. But you can’t.
You’ve always been selfish when it comes to Heeseung, unable to deny him anything. So you type out a reply before you can think better of it.
9:22 am | you: i’ll stop by after work.
Setting the phone down, you try to convince yourself that this will be the last time. You’ll go over there, tell him the kiss was a mistake and tell him about the engagement announcement. You’ll encourage him to give Sakura a real chance.
Yeah, you’ll do the right thing.
You spend the rest of the afternoon finishing up paperwork, your mind elsewhere the entire time. By the time the clock hits 7 p.m, you’ve packed up your things and are preparing to leave when your phone buzzes with an incoming FaceTime call.
It’s Yunho.
You sigh softly before answering, his smiling face filling the screen.
“Yo,” he greets. “You up for game night at mine? Chisa’s already on her way.”
You hesitate, “I can’t tonight. My first day back was a bit overwhelming. I just need some sleep.”
Yunho frowns, clearly not convinced. “You sure? I don’t want you falling back into a slump.”
“I’m fine. I promise. Just tired. I’ll stop by tomorrow—I’m off, so I’ll spend the whole day with you.”
He studies you for a moment before nodding reluctantly. “Alright. But you better not flake on me.”
“I won’t,” you say softly. “Thanks, Yunho.”
“Anytime,” he says before ending the call.
You exhale slowly, setting your phone aside. You gather your things and head to your car. The drive to Heeseung’s home feels excruciatingly long, your thoughts racing the entire way. By the time you pull up to his home your nerves are frayed but you force yourself to get out of the car and head inside.
This is it. One last time.
You make your way up the familiar stone steps to Heeseung’s front door. Your hand hovers for a moment before you knock, three soft taps against the wood.
A beat passes. Then another. Then another. For a moment, you wonder if he changed his mind about wanting to see you, but then you hear the faint shuffle of footsteps on the other side. The door opens, revealing Heeseung. His expression is unreadable.
“Hey,” he says softly, his voice a little raspy.
“Hey,” you reply.
He steps aside to let you in and you hesitantly cross the threshold, the warmth of his home doing little to soothe the chill in your bones. The atmosphere is tense and awkward in a way that neither of you seems to know how to address.
The last time it felt like this was the first time you met him, when you were still trying to figure him out and he was sizing you up in return. That day, you were both strangers, carefully tiptoeing around each other. And now…now, things couldn’t be more complicated.
Heeseung leads you into the living room and gestures for you to sit and you do, choosing the far end of the couch. The space you put between you feels significant, like a boundary you’re desperately trying to maintain.
Heeseung watches you for a moment before sitting down as well, leaning back slightly but keeping his eyes fixed on you. You clutch the strap of your bag, running your fingers along the leather in an attempt to calm yourself. The silence is thick, and you don’t know how to start.
You break first. “Miss Min is announcing the engagement tomorrow.”
The words hang in the air. You glance at him but his expression doesn’t betray much. Heeseung’s gaze shifts away for a moment then back to you. His jaw tightens and he exhales deeply.
“I’m calling it off,” he says suddenly, his voice steady and sure.
Your heart stops. You stare at him, certain you misheard. “W-what?”
“I’m calling it off,” he repeats, turning to face you fully. His eyes are locked onto yours, and the intensity in them makes it impossible to look away. “I’m done prioritizing everyone else’s happiness over my own. I can’t keep pretending to be okay with this.”
You blink at him stunned. Your mind races, trying to make sense of his words. “Heeseung…you can’t just—”
“I don’t want Sakura,” he interrupts. He leans forward slightly, closing some of the distance between you. “I want you.”
The confession feels like a punch to the gut. You shake your head, your hands gripping the strap of your bag even tighter. “No. Heeseung, you don’t mean that.”
“I do,” he says without hesitation. “I’ve tried to deny it, to push it down but I can’t anymore. I can’t lie to myself—or to you.”
“Heeseung—”
“I know this isn’t how things were supposed to happen. I know the way this started was unconventional but none of that changes the way I feel about you.”
You’re frozen, unable to respond.
“I like you. I’ve spent the past month trying to ignore it, trying to convince myself that it was just…a passing thing. But it’s not. I can’t stop thinking about you. About the way you challenge me, the way you see through all the bullshit, the way you care.” He says, his voice trembling just slightly.
His words are a direct hit to your heart. You swallow hard, your throat tight as tears prick at the corners of your eyes. “I want you too,” you admit, your voice barely audible. “But we can’t.”
“Why not? Who says we can’t?” He asks, his tone almost desperate now. He scoots closer to you on the couch, his knees brushing against yours.
You shake your head, trying to find the right words. “Because…because it’s messy and wrong, Heeseung. You’re engaged to someone else. Someone kind and sweet who doesn’t deserve to be hurt.”
Heeseung reaches out, his hands cupping your face gently forcing you to look at him. His touch is warm. “I don’t want her. I want you.”
“Heeseung…” you choke out.
“I don’t care how messy it is. I don’t care what anyone else thinks. All I care about is you and I need to know if you feel the same.”
You hesitate, your heart conflicting with your mind. Every rational part of you is screaming that this is a mistake, that you’re walking into dangerous territory. But your heart…your heart is begging you to take the leap.
“I…” Your voice falters, and you look into his eyes, the sincerity in them making it impossible to lie. “I do. I feel the same.”
His lips part slightly, relief washing over his face. “Then that’s all that matters.”
You shake your head again, tears slipping down your cheeks. “But it’s not that simple.”
“It is,” he insists, his hands still cradling your face. “It is if you want it to be. Just say yes.”
“Heeseung…”
“Please,” he whispers, his voice breaking slightly. “Just say yes.”
Your heart feels like it’s going to explode. You know you shouldn’t, you know this is dangerous, but you can’t bring yourself to deny him. You’ve never been able to deny him and you don’t think you could now, not when he’s looking at you like this, like you’re the only thing that matters in the world.
“Okay,” you whisper, barely able to get the word out. “Yes.”
Heeseung exhales sharply, like he’s been holding his breath this entire time. And then before you can second-guess yourself, his lips are on yours. The kiss is soft at first, almost hesitant, but it quickly deepens, his hands sliding to the back of your neck to pull you closer.
You melt into him, every doubt, every fear fading away as his warmth envelops you. In this moment, nothing else matters. Just him. Just this.
You part your lips slightly, letting him deepen the kiss. His tongue brushes against yours and a quiet whimper escapes your throat, the sound swallowed by his kiss. Heeseung’s grip tightens, one hand sliding down to your waist as he pulls you impossibly closer.
You barely register the moment when he tugs you into his lap, your knees straddling him as his hands settle on your hips. You instinctively brace your hands on his shoulders. His warmth radiates through the fabric of his shirt, his broad chest firm beneath your palms. You can feel his heart pounding just as wildly as your own.
It feels right; this moment, his touch, the way he holds you. For a fleeting second, you remember all the things you need to address. All the unanswered questions about how this will work, what it will mean for both of you. But right now, none of that seems important. Right now, you focus on the way his lips move against yours, the way his hands hold you as if he never wants to let go.
Your breath hitches when you feel him harden beneath you, the unmistakable evidence of his desire making heat pool low in your belly. The realization sends a flush of warmth spreading across your cheeks, but Heeseung doesn’t give you a moment to linger on it. His grip on your hips tightens slightly as he kisses you deeper.
Without breaking the kiss, he stands, his hands sliding under your thighs to lift you effortlessly. A gasp escapes you, muffled against his mouth as your arms wrap instinctively around his neck. He carries you through the house, navigating the short distance to his bedroom with ease.
When he sets you down on the bed his movements are slow and deliberate. His lips leave yours for a brief moment, and you’re left catching your breath as he pulls back just enough to look at you. The way he gazes down at you makes your chest tighten and pussy clench. There’s so much emotion in his eyes, all mixed together in a way that makes you feel both shy and hot under his gaze.
You look away for a moment, heat rising to your cheeks but Heeseung gently tilts your chin back to face him. “Do you want this?” he asks. His hands fall down to your hips, pushing up your blouse to feel the softness of your stomach beneath his palms.
You look at him through your lashes and stare at his face for a minute trying to decipher what he’s thinking. He’s always been a person who wears their emotions on their face, and now, as you look up into his eyes searching for any hesitation— you find none. You find nothing but pure want and admiration.
“Yes,” you whisper. “I want this. I want you.”
The corners of his lips lift in a small relieved smile and then he’s leaning down again, capturing your mouth in another kiss.
Heeseung pulls back just slightly, his hands still resting on your hips as his eyes search yours. His fingers trail lightly along the hem of your blouse and he murmurs, “Raise your arms for me.” You do as he asks, lifting your arms above your head and Heeseung takes his time peeling your shirt off, his knuckles brushing your skin as he tugs it free. The fabric falls to the floor and he pauses for a moment to take you in. His gaze sweeps over you with such hunger that you lose your breath.
Heeseung pulls his own shirt off in one smooth motion and you can’t help but stare. His chest rises and falls steadily, his toned muscles illuminated in the dim light of the room. He catches your gaze and offers you a small reassuring smile as he leans closer again.
You bite your bottom lip suddenly feeling self-conscious under his intense gaze but Heeseung seems to notice. He cups your cheek, his thumb brushing lightly over your skin. “Don’t be nervous,” he whispers, his voice gentle, soothing. “I’ll be gentle.”
You nod slightly, your lips parting as he leans down to press another kiss to your lips. His hands trail down to the clasp of your bra and he pauses for just a moment, giving you time to stop him if you want to. When you don’t, he deftly unhooks it and slides it off your shoulders.
Your breath hitches as the cool air grazes your skin and Heeseung takes a moment to admire you, his eyes softening as if committing every inch of you to memory. His tenderness feels almost overwhelming, and your heart beats wildly as he gently lays you back down on the bed.
He leans in again, placing a soft peck on your lips before his mouth begins a slow descent. His lips trail kisses down your collarbone, lingering for a moment before continuing down the center of your chest.
When his lips reach your navel he pauses, his warm breath fanning over your skin. “Can I taste you baby?”
You shyly nod at the question and use of pet name not used to it. Heeseung shakes his head though, “no baby. I need to hear you say yes. C’mon, let me hear that beautiful voice.”
You lift your hips off his bed not able to voice your wants. He smirks and kisses your naval again. “C’mon baby, tell me what you want.”
You huff frustrated. “Heeseung please…I need you.”
“There we go.”
He helps you unbutton your slacks and slides them down your legs and tosses them onto the growing pile on the floor. Heeseung grips onto the band of your panties and slides them down. Once you’re completely naked, he dips his fingers into your sticky dripping pussy.
He hisses at the feeling of your warm cunt wrapped around his fingers “Mmm, you’re so wet, baby,” he says, a pathetic whimper escapes you in response.
Heesueng dives his head in between your thighs and kisses your clit just once before pulling his head back again. There’s a few seconds of silence, of anticipating what he’s going to do next.
You gasp as you watch him lock eyes with you before spitting directly onto your clit. You bite your lip to keep in the moan that wants to escape at the feeling of his spit dripping from your clit down your pussy, making a mess of you and his sheets beneath you.
Heeseung leans back down and latches onto your clit, sucking harshly. Pleasure shoots through your veins and your stomach clenches. Heeseung groans, the vibration making you shake underneath him. His eyes flutter closed, savoring the feeling of your legs thrown over his shoulders and the taste of you.
His tongue laps up your juices, he’s slurping loudly enjoying every drop of your sweet arousal on his tongue. He licks fast up and down your pussy, parting your folds with the tip of his hot tongue. Your legs are shaking, your right hand tangles in his hair to make sure he stays down. "H-heeseung," you hiccup, starting to grind your hips for added pleasure.
Heeseung moans, flicking his tongue on your clit quickly. You feel his fingers at your entrance again, playing with your slick, stroking up and down your folds. Your breath quickens more, you can hear your heartbeat in your ears.
“Fuck,” you whimper, wincing at the slight burn as he inserts two fingers into you slowly. You haven’t had anything inside of you for so long, you welcome the pain that comes with it.
“Gonna stretch you out nice and good,” Heeseung growls against your sopping cunt. “Make sure you’re ready to take my fat cock, isn’t that right baby?”
You nod dumbly at his words, grinding your hips onto his fingers as the tightening feeling in your lower stomach keeps building.
"Oh, f-fuck, baby, I’m gonna cum." You’re starting to babble, moans becoming increasingly higher in pitch. You try pushing yourself higher up on the bed trying to escape his grasp, it’s all too much. Your thighs start shaking and Heeseung takes it upon himself to grip a little tighter to keep you in place.
He practically buries his face in your pussy, stimulating you with his tongue and the tip of his nose whilst still fucking you with his fingers. He grunts, sucking on your pussy whilst flicking his tongue over your swollen clit, his fingers curling deep inside of you.
“Cum for me doll,” Heeseung begs, desperate to pull an orgasm from you just to lick it all up. “Be a good girl and cum on my face.”
"Oh fuck," you choke out, your hips bucking.
Your legs close up on him, nearly crushing his head. Your fingers pull on his hair but Heeseung keeps on licking and sucking the whole time. With the pressure on your clit and the fullness of his fingers scissoring deep in your core you can’t help it, the budding tightness unraveling as you come onto his tongue. Your body shakes lightly, trembling in his grip as you let out loud needy moans.
“Fuck, you’re so beautiful,” He confesses as he watches you ride out your orgasm.
Heeseung pulls back and exhales shakily, his thumb tracing gentle circles on your hip as he leans down to press a soft, lingering kiss to your lips. “I’ll be right back,” he murmurs, his voice tender.
You nod still, catching your breath, watching as he pushes himself up from the bed. He moves to his bathroom and disappears behind the partially open door. You hear the faint rustle of a cabinet being opened, and your heart races when you catch sight of him returning with a small box in his hand.
Heeseung sets the box down on the nightstand and pulls out a single foil packet. His movements are deliberate but unhurried, as if giving you all the time in the world to change your mind.
When he settles back beside you he cups your face with one hand and kisses you softly, his lips conveying reassurance and care. “We don’t have to go any further,” he says, his forehead resting against yours. “We can stop here if you want.”
His sincerity makes your heart flutter and for a moment all you can do is stare into his eyes. But then you lean in, your lips brushing his as you whisper, “I don’t want to stop.”
You don’t let the kiss last long, pulling away to look Heeseung in his eyes as you slowly sink to your knees in front of him. He gulps as he watches you with hooded eyes, lifting his hips so you can remove his sweats and boxers. The moment his cock springs out, your jaw nearly drops to the floor. Not only is he long, but he’s also thick and veiny. Your mouth waters at the sight of it, he twitches in the air, red and angry waiting for attention.
You flick your eyes up to meet Heeseung’s impatient gaze before wrapping your dominant hand around the base and slowly tugging. Heeseung groans at the feeling and spreads his legs a bit more to give you better access. You kiss the tip of his erect cock, slowly opening your mouth to suck at the tip of his dick. You wrap your lips around his head, slowly sucking the tip into your mouth as precum drips out and coats your tongue.
Heeseung lets out a breathy moan, thrusting into your mouth slightly as he urges you to take him deeper into your mouth. You willingly swallow more of him, tongue swirling around his head, groaning at the taste of his precum.
You begin bobbing your head, taking more and more of his hard length into your mouth. Heeseung grips on to your hair and slides you further down his length. “That’s it, princess. Take this big dick down your throat.” He begins thrusting his hips gradually, forcing more and more of his cock into your mouth until you take in his whole shaft, your face pressed against his lower abdomen.
Heeseung thrusts harder into your mouth, losing himself in the feel of your lips wrapped tightly around him, letting out a small groan whenever you flick your tongue against his slit, licking the precum.
“F-fuck just like that.” You’re slowly coating his cock in your saliva, the mixture of your spit and his precum turning him into a sticky mess.
Wet sounds of gagging resound through the air, mingling with the sounds of Heeseung thrusting into your mouth. You feel his cock twitch inside you before he says. “Gonna swallow all my cum like a good girl? Hm?”
You hum around him, eager to bring him over the edge. “Oh, oh fuck, I’m cumming.” Heeseung groans, gritting his teeth. He thrusts his hip one last time before cumming. You feel his cum shoot down the back of your throat and you make sure to swallow the warm liquid, not wasting a single drop.
“Fuck. You’re amazing” Heeseung mutters, pulling you off of his dick before kissing you, tasting himself. You kiss him back fervently, your fingers burying into his red locks.
“I need you Hee,” You whimper.
Heeseung nods and picks you up to lay you flat on your back. “Anything for you princess.” He leans over to grab the condom from earlier and opens the foil. He tosses the wrapping and slowly slides the condom down his shaft. Once he’s sure it’s secure he hovers over your body just taking you in.
You blush but whine, spreading your legs a bit more. “Heeseung….please.”
He smirks at the desperation in your voice before leaning down to close his lips over your right nipple. You whimper at the feeling of his tongue on your nipple, sucking it into his mouth before pulling back and blowing cold air on it.
You lay still, anticipating his next move. His eyes flick down. “Your pussy looks so fucking good.” Heeseung says, letting the pink tip of his dick rub against your wet folds. You both moan at the sensation.
With one more rub of his head, he lines himself against your entrance and slowly pushes his hips forward. You think you could come instantly.
Heeseung shifts above you, moving so his hands cage you between both his arms. You moan as he slowly enters you, his girth stretching your pussy out. He buries his face into the crook of your neck and places a kiss at the juncture of your jaw and neck at the feeling of your walls clamping around him. Finally, when he’s completely in your pussy, his head grazing cervix, he stills and shifts his head to meet your eyes. You look up at him through hazy, half lidded eyes, completely lost in the way he opens you up. Heeseung stills for a couple moments, allowing you to get used to his size before pulling out and thrusting in once again, this time in one smooth glide. You let out a choked-out moan, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist.
The intimacy is overwhelming, a closeness that feels as though it’s unraveling you and putting you back together all at once. He holds you like you’re something precious, something fragile, as if he’s afraid you might slip away if he isn’t careful.
His gaze never leaves yours. The way his eyes search your face, looking for any sign of discomfort fills you with a warmth you’ve never known. There’s no urgency in him, no impatience, just a steady gentle rhythm.
“Right t-there” You mewl, slowly losing yourself in all the pleasure. Heeseung tucks his head under yours and grins against your skin, biting your collarbone gently before sucking a hickey on your skin. He trails kisses down to the valley of your breasts, pressing a kiss against your sternum before taking a nipple into his mouth, suckling gingerly. “P-please Hee, can’t…gonna cum” You babble, unable to form a coherent sentence.
You faintly acknowledge Heeseung grinning against your chest, his right hand slowly inches towards your own before entwining it with your own. Holding your hand over his sheets. You can feel him pour out all his emotions into each and every action as he thrusts into you over and over again.
“You’re so beautiful.” Heeseung whispers.
All of a sudden you cum without warning, the pressure too much. Heeseung pushes your hips down into the bed, pounding relentlessly into you, chasing his own high. He hammers into you one last time before letting out a loud groan as he empties himself into the condom, spurt after spurt of his cum pouring into you.
The world feels quiet now, the only sound in the room your mingled breaths as you both come down from the high. Heeseung’s forehead rests against yours, his hand still clasping yours tightly as if letting go would somehow make the moment less real. His thumb strokes over your knuckles.
“You okay?” he asks softly, his voice hoarse and laced with concern.
You nod, barely able to gather the words to respond. “I’m okay,” you whisper.
A small, relieved smile touches his lips before he leans down, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. Heeseung shifts slightly, careful not to crush you as he pulls out. You wince at the sensitivity and he quickly apologizes.
“Stay here,” he murmurs, reluctantly letting go of your hand. He slips out of bed, the mattress dipping slightly under his movement.
You watch as he crosses the room, disposing of the condom in the bathroom and cleaning himself off before grabbing a warm damp cloth. When he returns, he kneels beside the bed, his touch impossibly gentle as he cleans you up murmuring soft reassurances. “You did so well,” he says quietly, his voice full of affection. “Thank you… for trusting me with you.”
Your cheeks warm, but you manage a soft smile and nod.
Heeseung’s gaze softens even further, and he presses a kiss to your knee before standing to place the cloth aside. He joins you back in bed, pulling the sheets up over your bodies before tugging you into his arms. You rest your head on his chest, your legs tangling with his as his hand strokes your back in soothing circles.
“You’re amazing,” he murmurs, his fingers drawing lazy patterns on your back. “I hope you know that.”
You huff a small laugh, finally finding your voice. “You don’t have to flatter me, you already got what you wanted.”
Heeseung chuckles, the sound vibrating through his chest. “Maybe I just like telling you how I feel.” He tilts his head to look at you, his expression soft and unguarded. “Can I?”
You glance up at him, confused. “Can you what?”
“Tell you more about me…The messy parts. The things I don’t usually share.”
Your breath catches slightly at the vulnerability in his voice but you nod. “I’d like that.”
His grip on you tightens just a little, as if you're his own personal stress ball. He doesn’t start talking right away, his thumb brushing along your shoulder as if he’s organizing his thoughts. You don’t rush him content to lie there in his embrace waiting for him to open up.
Finally, he speaks. “When I was fifteen, my brother Heejoon was seventeen,” he begins, his voice quiet but steady. “He was… everything you’d expect from an eldest son in our family—smart, responsible, always trying to do the right thing. But he struggled a lot too. Heejoon always had anxiety. It wasn’t obvious at first; he’d just get nervous about things other people didn’t think twice about. But as we got older… it got worse.”
You shift slightly in his arms looking up at him with concern. Heeseung’s gaze is fixed on the ceiling, his jaw tight as he continues.
“Our dad…he’s a no-nonsense kind of man. Everything is about discipline, results, and maintaining the family’s reputation. That summer, he was preparing Heejoon to start interning at the company. Heejoon was terrified but he didn’t tell anyone. He didn’t want to disappoint our dad. So he just… pushed himself harder. He started focusing on the business, trying to prepare, but his grades started slipping. He was so afraid of letting Dad down that he…he cheated on a final exam.”
Heeseung clears his throat. “He got caught and Dad had to bribe the teacher to keep it off his record and let him retake the exam. He was livid, but he didn’t hit him or anything. He’s never laid a hand on us. But his words…” Heeseung’s voice falters, and he looks away.
Your heart aches for him, for Heejoon. You reach up, cupping his cheek and gently guiding his gaze back to you. “What happened?” you whisper.
Heeseung closes his eyes for a moment, like he’s reliving the memory. “Heejoon couldn’t take it anymore. The pressure to be perfect, to be something he wasn’t…that night, after Dad tore into him, he tried to kill himself.”
Your heart drops at the confirmation of what you knew all along.
“I was the one who found him,” Heeseung continues, his voice barely audible now. “We got him to the hospital in time, but… he was never the same after that. His will to live was just… gone.”
You sit up slightly, your eyes searching his face. “Heeseung…”
He meets your gaze, his own eyes glassy but resolute. “Heejoon’s alive. But he’s not… He’s not the same person he used to be.”
You gently take his hand in both of yours, your fingers wrapping around his as if to anchor him. “I’m so sorry you had to go through that,” you say softly, your voice steady but full of empathy. “And I’m so glad he’s still here. Heeseung… You’ve been through so much and you’re still here too. You’re still fighting. That means something.”
Heeseung shakes his head slowly, his grip on your body tightening. “I blamed myself for years,” he murmurs, his voice strained. “I saw how much he was struggling and I didn’t do anything. I was his little brother—I was supposed to have his back and I didn’t. I just stood there, thinking he’d be fine because he was Heejoon. He was always the strong one.”
His voice cracks and you reach up brushing your fingers lightly along his jaw, grounding him. He leans into your touch almost unconsciously, his eyes fluttering closed for a moment.
“When I see him now…” He pauses, exhaling shakily. “I can’t stop thinking about how different his life could’ve been if I’d just said something. If I’d told someone how scared he was, how much pressure he was under. Maybe… maybe he wouldn’t have felt like he had no other choice.” His gaze drops to yours, his eyes shimmering with unshed tears. “I failed him.”
Your chest tightens at the rawness in his voice, the weight he’s been carrying alone for so long. “Heeseung,” you say softly, “you didn’t fail him. You were a kid too, trying to survive in the same house under the same pressure. You did the best you could with what you knew then. That matters.”
His lips twitch faintly, but the guilt in his eyes doesn’t fade. “Some days, it doesn’t feel like enough,” he admits quietly.
“It is,” you insist, leaning closer your hand still resting against his cheek. “Every time you show up for Heejoon, every time you keep going, you’re proving how much you care. You’re making him proud, Heeseung. I know it.”
Heeseung looks at you for a long moment, his gaze filled with something you can’t quite place. Finally, he nods, his grip on you tightening slightly. “Thank you,” he says, his voice thick with emotion.
“Where’s Heejoon now?” you ask gently.
“He’s in an assisted living facility,” Heeseung replies. “After the incident, Dad couldn’t… He couldn’t live with him anymore. The guilt ate at him so he sent him away to get professional help. Heejoon’s been there ever since. He’s getting better, slowly. His doctors think he might be able to come home soon.”
You smile softly. “That’s good. I’m glad he’s getting the help he needs.”
Heeseung nods, his expression thoughtful. “I visit him every weekend,” he says.
Your brows furrow slightly. “Every weekend?”
Heeseung glances at you, his brows raising in question.
You hesitate before continuing. “The tabloids… They say you sneak off to Jeju every weekend to sleep with a new model,” you say carefully.
Heeseung scoffs, the sound almost bitter. “Heejoon’s care facility is in Jeju,” he explains. “My parents didn’t want anyone knowing what happened so they sent him there to keep it quiet.”
Your heart aches at the weight he must’ve been carrying alone. “So… those rumors?”
“Bullshit,” Heeseung says firmly. “You’re the first person I’ve slept with in years.”
You blink surprised. “Really?”
He nods. “I won’t lie and say I’ve never slept around. I did, but that was during my undergrad days… before I met Karina.”
The name sends a jolt through you, his ex who he allegedly forced to get an abortion. “Who’s Karina?” you ask carefully, playing oblivious to know the truth.
Heeseung’s expression shifts, the room is quiet save for the hum of the heater and the faint rustle of the sheets as he shifts closer. His hand trails absently along your arm, his touch warm “She was… the first person I ever loved,” he admits.
You listen intently as he begins to tell you about her. He shares how their relationship came to be, how she made him feel seen in a way no one else ever had but he also tells you about the heartbreak that followed when she left. About her carrying another man's baby and leaving because it wasn’t fair to Heeseung despite how badly he wanted her to stay.
Heeseung exhales, his voice trembling just slightly. “I should’ve fought harder. I should’ve convinced her to stay. Instead, I let her go. I told myself it was what she wanted but deep down, I think I was scared. Scared of everything that came with loving her, scared I’d mess it all up anyway.”
He pauses, his fingers grazing your back, his gaze distant. “It’s a pattern, you know? People leave me but maybe… maybe it’s because I push them away first. Like I did with her.”
His words hang heavy in the air. You sit up slightly, leaning on your elbow to face him. “Heeseung, listen to me,” you say softly, your right hand resting gently on his chest. “What happened with Karina wasn’t your fault. You need to stop carrying this like it was all on you, like you had the power to change everything. There’s nothing wrong with you, and you’re more than deserving of love—then and now.”
His lips part slightly as if to protest but no words come out. His eyes search yours, filled with doubt and pain, as though he’s grappling with the possibility of believing you.
“She didn’t leave because you weren’t enough,” you continue. “You were both young, and Karina… she was stuck in an impossible situation. That doesn’t mean you failed her, Heeseung. It doesn’t mean you were to blame. Her insecurities, her choices—they weren’t your burden to carry or fix. Just because you had a past, just because you were more experienced, doesn’t mean you pushed her away. Those were her fears, not a reflection of your worth.”
His grip on your waist tightens slightly, his breathing uneven. His eyes glisten with unshed tears as his brows draw together, struggling with the truth in your words.
“You have to let go of this idea that you’re the reason things fell apart,” you whisper, brushing your thumb tenderly along his jawline. “Sometimes people leave not because of anything you did but because they don’t know how to stay. It’s not about you being enough—it never was. And it doesn’t mean you’re not enough now.”
Heeseung swallows hard, his head dipping as his forehead presses lightly against yours. “I don’t know if I can believe that yet,” he murmurs, his voice barely audible.
“That’s okay,” you reply, your voice soft but resolute. “I’ll remind you as many times as it takes.”
For a moment the room falls into stillness, the only sound is the mingling of your breaths. You feel his arm wrap tighter around your midsection pulling you closer, the tension in his shoulders easing ever so slightly.
Then, in the quiet you speak, your voice barely above a whisper. “Heeseung… I already knew about Karina”
His head pulls back slightly, his brows furrowing in confusion as his gaze locks onto yours. “What do you mean?” He asks, his tone cautious, tinged with uncertainty.
You take in a breath gathering the courage to continue. “I knew about her. About what people said. Before you told me.”
His confusion deepens, flickers of uncertainty and hurt shadowing his expression. “How?” he asks softly, his voice low and guarded, his walls creeping back up.
You hesitate, your fingers fidgeting with the edge of the blanket draped over you both but you push through the fear because this is Heeseung and he deserves honesty.
“Remember how I told you Chisa is a journalist?” you begin carefully.
Heeseung nods slowly but you can already see it—the way his shoulders tense, the way his eyes darken. His defenses are rising, and it crushes you to watch the vulnerability you’d shared moments ago slip away.
“Chisa is writing an exposé. About your college days. She has a source—someone who knows about Karina, about the rumors that you…that you asked her to get an abortion.”
Heeseung goes still, his body tensing beneath your touch. He’s silent for a moment, his gaze fixed behind you. Then finally he speaks his voice sharp and clipped. “How long have you known?”
You swallow the lump forming in your throat, knowing there’s no point in lying. “Chisa got put on the article the day we first met but I didn’t find out about the rumors until… the day you asked me to dinner.”
Heeseung’s jaw tightens and he slowly pulls away from you, the space between you growing wider as your heart drops. He sits up slightly, running a hand through his hair. His expression is a mix of hurt and disbelief.
You instinctively grab the blanket to cover your bare body, not out of modesty but because the emotional distance feels unbearable. “Heeseung…” you begin softly, but he cuts you off.
“You knew all this time,” he says, his voice low and tinged with disbelief. “And you didn’t say anything?”
“I didn’t know how,” you say quickly, your voice trembling. “Heeseung, you have to understand—Chisa is my best friend. This article is everything to her.”
He lets out a bitter laugh, shaking his head as he runs a hand through his hair. “And what about me?” he asks, his voice rising slightly. “Did you even think about what that could do to me? About how I’d feel if you believed those rumors?”
“I didn’t believe them. I didn’t, Heeseung but I didn’t know you then. I didn’t know how to bring it up or if I even should! You have to understand—if I said anything to you or Miss Min, it would’ve meant the end of my friendship with Chisa. I didn’t know what to do.”
Heeseung’s gaze is piercing, his silence more cutting than any words he could’ve said. You feel the weight of his disappointment, his hurt and it tears at you.
You feel tears threaten to spill over now but you don’t bother wiping them away. Instead, you reach for his hand, grabbing onto it tightly even as he stiffens under your touch. The blanket slips from your body leaving you exposed but you don’t care. You need him to understand.
“This wasn’t an easy decision to make. I’ve been stuck between my best friend and her career and the guy I—” You catch yourself, your breath hitching. “The guy I care about. I’m sorry I didn’t say something sooner. I’m sorry I hurt you but I don’t want you to be blindsided by this Heeseung. I don’t want you to be hurt anymore. That’s why I’m telling you now.”
Heeseung stares at you, his expression softening slightly as your words sink in. He exhales deeply, the anger in his gaze giving way to understanding. “Okay,” he says softly after a long moment, his tone laced with exhaustion. “Okay.”
Before you can say anything else, he pulls you into his arms, his hand cradling the back of your head as you bury your face in his shoulder. “Don’t cry,” he murmurs, his voice gentle again. “Please don’t cry. I’m not mad at you.”
“Are you sure?” you whisper, your voice muffled against his skin.
He nods, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I could never stay mad at you.”
The two of you settle back under the covers, his arms holding you close again not leaving any space between the two of you. After a beat of silence, Heeseung speaks again. “I have to pull the plug on the article… you know that, right?”
You nod against his chest, your heart sinking at the thought of what this will mean for Chisa and your friendship. “Can you at least let me tell her before you make any phone calls?”
Heeseung hesitates, his fingers massaging your shoulder as he considers your request. “Are you sure you’ll be able to do that? To look her in the eyes and tell her you’re the reason her dreams won’t come true?”
You flinch at the harshness of his words, but you understand where they’re coming from. “I have to,” you say quietly. “I owe her that much.”
Heeseung exhales, nodding reluctantly. “Okay.”
He holds you closer, his chin resting on the top of your head as the two of you sit in silence. Despite everything, there’s a strange sense of comfort in knowing you don’t have to carry this secret anymore. As the minutes stretch on, the tension slowly fades, replaced by the steady rhythm of your breaths syncing together. And eventually, the two of you drift off to sleep, tangled in each other’s arms.
THE NEXT MORNING
You wake up slowly, sunlight streaming through the curtains and warming the room. For a moment, you forget where you are, your body pressed against soft sheets and someone warm and firm beside you. Blinking, the events of last night come flooding back and a soft smile tugs at your lips. You hadn’t planned to stay the night but waking up here wrapped in Heeseung’s arms, doesn’t feel like a mistake. It feels… right.
Shifting slightly, you glance over at him. He’s still asleep, his features relaxed and peaceful in the early morning light. His hair is slightly mussed, his lips parted as he breathes deeply. He looks younger like this, the weight he often carries nowhere in sight.
You try to move carefully not wanting to wake him up but the slight shift of your body stirs him. His arms tighten instinctively around your waist, pulling you closer as his eyes flutter open.
“Morning,” he murmurs, his voice husky with sleep and a small smile curving his lips.
“Morning,” you reply softly, your own smile growing.
Heeseung leans in and presses a lingering kiss to your lips, his hand coming up to cup your cheek. When he pulls back, his eyes are filled with a warmth that makes your heart race. “I could get used to waking up like this,” he says, his voice still low.
You laugh softly, brushing a strand of hair from his face, the silky red strands slipping through your fingers. “As nice as this is, I really should get going. Chisa’s probably worried about me.”
Before you can move, Heeseung tightens his hold on you, burying his face in your neck with a dramatic sigh. When he pulls back just enough to meet your gaze, his lower lip juts out in a pout so exaggerated it almost makes you laugh out loud.
“Stay,” he whines, his voice soft and petulant. “Just for a little longer. Please?”
You blink, momentarily stunned. This side of him is so unlike the composed and confident Heeseung you’ve grown accustomed to. The playful pout on his lips, the slight scrunch of his nose, and the sparkle of mischief in his eyes are all so…unexpected.
And yet, you think to yourself, you’d like to see this version of him more often, this carefree boyish Heeseung who doesn’t seem burdened.
You shake your head, laughing. “Heeseung, as much as I’d love to stay in bed all day, I promised Yunho I’d spend the day with him. And knowing my friends, Jaehyun and Chisa are probably going to tag along.”
At the mention of your plans, Heeseung lets out a resigned sigh, finally releasing his hold on you. “Fine,” he mutters, feigning annoyance. “But only because I’m trying to be supportive of your friendships.”
You sit up, the blanket slipping from your shoulders as you begin gathering your clothes. As you pull your shirt over your head, you glance over at Heeseung. “What about you? What are your plans for the day?”
He clears his throat, his gaze flickering briefly away before returning to you as you move around the room. “I called Miss Min last night,” he begins quietly. “Postponed announcing the engagement.”
Your hands still for a moment, your chest tightening as you think of Sakura and what this means for her. “What are you going to do?” you ask, your voice barely above a whisper.
Heeseung sighs, his fingers raking through his hair. “I need to talk to Sakura today. In person, it’s the least I can do,” he says softly.
Your heart sinks a little further, your thoughts drifting to Sakura’s feelings for him and how this will affect her. “Let me know how it goes,” you say gently, folding your arms across your chest. “I’d like to apologize to her too.”
Heeseung hesitates, his brows knitting together. “You don’t have to do that,” he says, his voice firm but gentle. “I don’t mind taking the blame for this. You don’t need to get involved any more than you already are.”
You shake your head firmly. “No, Heeseung. I’m just as complicit in all of this. You shouldn’t have to shoulder all the blame—not after everything you’ve already been through. I need to own my part in it too.”
His gaze softens as he looks at you, and he takes a step closer, his hands brushing gently against your waist. He studies you for a moment before nodding, a small smile tugging at his lips. “You’re something else, you know that?”
You roll your eyes, trying to mask the flutter of your heart. “Don’t try to distract me with compliments,” you tease lightly, though the smile on your lips betrays your feigned irritation.
Heeseung chuckles softly, pulling you closer for a brief moment before letting his hands fall away. “I mean it,” he murmurs.
Once you’re dressed, you grab your phone from the nightstand, only to find it completely dead. Letting out a sigh, you glance over at Heeseung, who is now standing by the bed in just his boxers.
“You should probably put some clothes on,” you tease, unable to stop the smile that forms as he approaches you.
Heeseung smirks, his hands finding their way to your waist as he pulls you close. “Why? Planning on staying a little longer?”
You roll your eyes but your heart flutters as he leans down to kiss you. It’s slow and unhurried, filled with a tenderness that makes you momentarily forget why you need to leave.
When he finally pulls back, you sigh. “As tempting as that is, I really need to go. I have to tell Chisa about the article.”
“Stay for breakfast, at least?” he asks, his tone hopeful.
You hesitate, but the look in his eyes makes it impossible to say no. “Fine,” you relent, laughing softly. “One day, I’ll learn how to tell you no.”
Heeseung grins, taking your hand and leading you to the kitchen. “Good luck with that,” he teases.
You hop onto the countertop as he pulls out a pan and begins preparing the ingredients for pancakes. Watching him move around the kitchen, you find yourself thinking about how natural this feels—how easy it is to picture mornings like this being a regular thing.
As he pours the batter onto the pan, he slides between your legs, resting his hands on your thighs. “Gimme a kiss.”
“The pancakes will burn,” you say, laughing softly.
“They will if you don’t hurry up and kiss me,” he counters, his lips quirking into a playful smirk.
You roll your eyes but lean in, intending to give him a quick peck. Heeseung has other plans, deepening the kiss until you’re breathless. When he finally pulls back, he’s grinning smugly.
“You’re impossible,” you mutter but the warmth in your chest betrays your words.
“Impossible to resist,” he quips, turning back to the stove just in time to flip the pancake, which, to your surprise, isn’t burnt.
Once the pancakes are done, you help him with the eggs while he cuts up some fresh fruit he had laying around. The two of you work together, the easy banter making the morning feel light and carefree.
When everything is ready, you sit together at the kitchen island, plates filled with food. For a while, there’s nothing but the sound of utensils and quiet conversation.
Heeseung breaks the silence, his tone thoughtful. “I could get used to this.”
You glance at him, your cheeks warming. “Me too,” you admit softly.
He doesn’t respond immediately, just stares at you in a way that makes your heart race.
“Your food’s going to get cold,” you say, laughing nervously under his gaze.
Heeseung shrugs, a playful smile tugging at his lips. “Worth it.”
You shove his shoulder lightly, trying to hide your flustered state. “Eat,” you scold, and he chuckles before finally picking up his fork.
As you finish your plate, you take a sip of the orange juice he poured for you, noting how he remembered your preference for sweet drinks. You don’t comment on it but the gesture doesn’t go unnoticed.
When Heeseung finishes eating, he stands and helps clear the dishes, his movements unhurried. You grab your bag and dead phone ready to head out.
Heeseung walks you to the door, his hand resting lightly on your waist. As you step outside, he makes no move to let go.
“You’re just in your boxers,” you point out, raising an eyebrow.
“So?” he replies, a teasing grin on his lips.
You swat his arm, laughing softly. “Go back inside before your neighbors get an eyeful.”
Heeseung laughs, pulling you into one last kiss before letting you go. “Drive safe,” he murmurs, his voice soft.
You nod, smiling as you climb into your car. The drive home is quiet, the events of the morning replaying in your mind.
When you arrive, you park your car and head up to your apartment building but when you step into the space, the atmosphere shifts. “Chisa?” you call out, your voice tentative as you set your bag down by the door.
The apartment is eerily silent, save for the faint hum of the refrigerator in the kitchen. You step further inside rounding the corner and your breath catches in your throat.
Chisa is sitting cross-legged in the middle of the living room, her back rigid and her gaze fixed on the wall in front of her. Her hands rest limply in her lap but there’s a tension radiating from her body that makes your stomach twist.
“Chisa?” you try again softer this time, taking a cautious step forward.
She doesn’t respond, doesn’t even blink. The silence stretches heavy and suffocating as you kneel in front of her, your hand hesitantly reaching for her shoulder.
“Hey,” you whisper, your voice barely audible.
This time, her eyes shift, locking onto yours with a sharpness that sends a shiver down your spine. Her gaze is cold, unyielding, and when she finally speaks, her voice is low and chilling.
“Did you tell Heeseung about my article?”
You freeze. The words knock the air out of your lungs, leaving you grasping for a response. How does she know? Heeseung promised to give you time to talk to her yourself.
“I—what?” you stammer, the sudden intensity of her glare making your heart race.
Chisa’s jaw clenches as she rises to her feet, looming over you. “I got a phone call from his lawyers in the middle of the night. They said I can’t publish my exposé. Did you tell him?”
Your chest tightens as realization dawns. Heeseung must have made the call while you were sleeping. A flicker of anger sparks within you—why hadn’t he let you handle this? You push it down, trying to focus on Chisa who looks like she’s seconds away from exploding.
“Yes.”
Chisa scoffs, her expression twisting into one of disbelief and fury. She takes a step back, shaking her head. “Unbelievable,” she mutters before spinning around and storming toward the hallway.
“Chisa, wait!” you call, scrambling to your feet and following her. “Please, just listen—”
She whirls around so suddenly that you almost stumble. Her hands shoot out, shoving you backward with a force that knocks the breath out of you.
You stumble, catching yourself. The shock of it leaves you frozen for a moment, your mind struggling to catch up with what just happened. Chisa has never done anything like this before. You’ve argued in the past, of course you have, but even in your worst moments, she never laid a hand on you. Not once.
She’s seething. Her chest rises and falls rapidly, her fists clenched so tightly at her sides that her knuckles turn white. Her eyes, usually warm and filled with love or mischief, are blazing with an intensity that makes your stomach churn.
“Listen to what?” she spits, her voice rising. “To you defending that manwhore? To you justifying why you chose him over me?”
“I didn’t choose him over you!”
“Yes, you did! You sacrificed my career for him! For what? Did he fuck you too?”
The words hit you like a slap and your mouth opens but no sound comes out. Chisa’s eyes widen as she takes in your reaction, her expression shifting from anger to disgust.
“No way,” she whispers, a bitter laugh escaping her lips. “You sold me out for some dick? Were you that fucking desperate?”
Your chest tightens with indignation. “It’s not like that!” you snap, your voice rising to match hers. “My relationship with Heeseung has nothing to do with why I told him.”
Chisa stares at you as if you’ve grown another head, her voice dripping with disdain. “Relationship?” She lets out a humorless laugh. “For someone with a master’s degree in psychology, you’re one dumb bitch. He’s not capable of loving anyone. Not his ex, not Sakura, and definitely not you.”
You flinch at the mention of Sakura, your mind racing. “Sakura? What—”
Chisa cuts you off, turning on her heel and storming back into the living room. She grabs the remote and flicks on the TV, jabbing the buttons with trembling hands.
The screen flickers to life, and your stomach drops like a stone when the news anchor’s voice fills the room. Their tone is bright and celebratory.
“Breaking news! A fairytale ending for Lee Heeseung and Miyawaki Sakura.”
A photo of the two smiling together flashes on the screen, and your knees feel like they might give out.
Chisa crosses her arms, her glare burning into you as the broadcast loops back to commentary. “The announcement was made official two hours ago,” she says coldly, her voice cutting through the air.
Two hours ago.
You were sitting in Heeseung’s kitchen, eating pancakes while he talked about getting used to seeing you in his home. He had said he’d told Miss Min to postpone the announcement. He’d promised. Your mind spins, struggling to reconcile the timeline. Did Heeseung lie? Or did something else happen, something out of his control?
“He’s scum. All he cares about is sex. And for you to think he could be happy with you—” She shakes her head.
“That’s not true! Your source lied, Chisa. He didn’t force Karina to have an abortion! He’s not sneaking off to Jeju every weekend to sleep with someone new! It’s all rumors, and the press has it twisted. They’re making his life hell! I couldn’t let you publish that article. It would have ruined him.”
Chisa’s expression shifts, her glare turning into something almost unrecognizable. Hurt mingles with her anger, and her voice trembles as she fires back, “So what? It was better to ruin me?”
You snap.
“Not everything is about you, Chisa! He’s a person too, with real feelings! He’s been through so much and he doesn’t deserve this!” You take a shaky breath, your voice still trembling with emotion. “There will always be another article to write, another person to exploit but Heeseung doesn’t deserve it. Get over yourself.”
Chisa’s face falls, her eyes wide with disbelief but you don’t give her a chance to respond. You turn on your heel and storm to your room, slamming the door shut behind you.
Your chest heaves as you lean against the door, your mind racing. This is not how things were supposed to go. You weren’t supposed to fight with Chisa—not like this.
You take a shaky breath and push off the door, fumbling to plug your phone into the charger. Impatience gnaws at you and you grab your laptop instead flipping it open and opening your messaging app.
Messages flood the screen. Texts from Chisa, Dani, even Miss Min.
7:25 pm | chiz🧸: where are you? game night started!!! 7:50 pm | chiz🧸: nvm yunho told me you can’t make it 10:49 pm | chiz🧸: im back home now where r u loser 12:15 am | chiz🧸: ?
You close the tab, your chest tightening as guilt seeps in.
4:32 am | danielle: do you know why heeseung called the office to postpone the announcement???
You let out a sigh of relief. Heeseung hadn’t changed his mind. He tried to stop it. You make a mental note to respond to Dani later, opting to read Miss Min’s messages.
4:55 am | Boss: You need to meet with Heeseung and Sakura. Get them aligned again. 10:37 am | Boss: The announcement is moving forward. It’s what his parents want.
So that’s what happened. A new message pings on your screen, it’s from Heeseung.
12:08 pm | heeseung: just saw the news. i’m so sorry 12:08 pm | heeseung: i don’t know what happened but i’ll fix it. 12:08 pm | heeseung: i’m on my way to meet with sakura now.
You don’t respond, instead you fall against your bed frame overwhelmed. Tears threaten to spill but you blink them back, refusing to let them fall. This can be fixed you try to reason, yeah. This can be fixed. Instead of wallowing in tears, you strip off your clothes and head into the bathroom. A hot shower…that’ll make everything better.
The water warms your skin, soothing your tense muscles as you try to wash away the sweat and grime from the night before. But your mind won’t stop racing. You think about Heeseung. About boundaries you’ll need to set with him. About Chisa—her hurt, her anger, the way she shoved you. The memory stings as do her words. You wonder if you’ll ever be okay again.
Steam fills the room, but it doesn’t clear the haze in your mind. All you can do is stand there, letting the water wash over you, hoping it’ll drown out your sadness. You spend over an hour in there, letting the water wash over you and your thoughts consume you.
When you exit the shower, the bathroom is silent save for the steady drip of water from the showerhead as you step out, your skin flushed from the heat. You grab a towel and wrap it around yourself, your hands moving on autopilot as you dry off. The warmth of the shower clings to your skin providing some comfort.
You pull on a pair of soft sweatpants and an oversized hoodie before padding back into your bedroom, you glance at your phone charging on the nightstand. Its screen lights up repeatedly, vibrating with an almost frantic urgency.
Frowning, you unplug it. The moment it’s in your hand, it buzzes again, a steady stream of notifications flooding the screen. Text after text appears, the sheer volume of them making your stomach churn.
Your sister’s name catches your eye, her message buried among others from Dani, Heeseung, and even Jaehyun.
Your breath hitches. Your sister hasn’t spoken to you in months. She claims to be too busy with her husband and kids but truthfully you think she just can’t stomach being around you knowing each conversation you’ll bring up your mother.
Why is she reaching out now?
Before you can open her messages, another text pops up at the top of the screen from Jaehyun.
12:12 pm | hyunie🐶: are you okay?
Your chest tightens. A gnawing sense of dread climbs up your spine as you respond
12:13 pm | you: ??? 12:13 pm | hyunie🐶: you haven’t seen? 12:14 pm | you: seen what?
The three dots indicating he’s typing appear and you hold your breath, dread pooling in your stomach. When the link comes through, you click it without thinking.
Your heart plummets as you read the headline: Heeseung’s Secret Romance: Scandal Behind the Engagement.
The article is a brutal exposé, detailing Heeseung’s past controversies, his relationship with Karina, the lies about the abortion then him trying to rebrand by leeching off of Sakura through an engagement and finally, the revelation of an affair. Chisa posted it anyway. She posted the exposé.
Your breath comes in short, shallow gasps as you skim the article. Chisa’s words are scathing, painting you as a homewrecker and Heeseung as a manipulative womanizer. She leaves you nameless but the implications are clear, this is her firing back at you.
Your phone buzzes again and you almost drop it. Jaehyun is calling.
You answer, your voice barely above a whisper. “Hello?”
“Is it true?”
“...Yes.”
“Shit. Okay. Look, stay off your phone. Don’t read any more of it, okay? Yunho and I are coming over.”
You nod instinctively forgetting he can’t see you. “Okay.”
“Just… don’t spiral. We’ll be there soon.”
The call ends but you don’t put your phone down. You can’t. The panic bubbling inside you demands an outlet and ignoring it feels impossible. Against Jaehyun’s advice, you open Twitter.
Your name is trending. So are Heeseung's and Sakura’s.
You click on the hashtag, your heart pounding as you scroll through the tweets. Each tweet feels like a slap to the face, but you can’t stop. You keep scrolling, the comments getting worse and worse.
A new post catches your eye, a link to a Naver article. The thumbnail is a picture of you and Heeseung walking out of the hotel bar after your one-on-one meeting. The title is even worse than Chisa’s: Lee Heeseung’s Mistress Revealed: The Marriage Counselor Who Betrayed the Nation’s Princess
The article is a gallery of photos and commentary, each image scrutinizing your every move. This one names you outright, detailing how you entered Heeseung’s life as a marriage counselor assigned to help him and Sakura navigate their engagement.
Instead of counseling the couple, sources claim ____ became romantically involved with Heeseung, undermining Sakura, a beloved actress and national icon. Photographic evidence further suggests a relationship that goes beyond professionalism.
Photographs accompany the text.
Him picking you up for dinner, his hand resting casually on the small of your back.
You walking into the restaurant on valentines holding the bouquet he gave you.
You entering his home late at night.
You leaving this morning, followed by a quick shot of him kissing you goodbye.
The captions are unsavory.
“Caught in the act: ____ leaving Lee Heeseung’s home after a cozy night in.”, “A romantic dinner for two—how long has this been going on?”
You scroll down to the comments, your vision blurring as you read them.
⤑ she’s disgusting. how dare she betray sakura like this? +1,102 ⤑ heeseung’s trash but she’s worse. she’s supposed to be a counselor? what a joke 💀 +874 ⤑ poor sakura. she deserves so much better (╥﹏╥) +2,347 ⤑ omo she’s so brazen 💀 +366
Your chest tightens painfully and your hands begin to shake. The more you scroll, the worse it gets.
⤑ she knew exactly what she was doing. she’s a homewrecker. +613 ⤑ imagine being this desperate. she’s ruined her career for what? a fling? ㅋㅋㅋㅋ +1,209 ⤑ sakura is the nation’s princess. this woman is a nobody. she doesn’t deserve him. +4,102
Your breath comes in shallow gasps as the room seems to shrink around you. Your phone trembles in your hands, and the screen darkens for a moment, forcing you to see your own reflection—tear-streaked and unrecognizable.
You sink to the floor, your back pressed against your bed, the phone slipping from your grasp. A loud creak breaks through the haze.
The door to your room opens slowly and you look up to see Chisa standing there, her expression is unreadable, somewhere between anger and exhaustion.
For a moment, neither of you speaks.
Your lips part to say something—anything—but the words catch in your throat.
Chisa steps farther into the room, her gaze sharp and accusing. “You’ve turned into him, you know.”
You blink, confused. “What?”
Her lips curl into a bitter smile but there’s no humor in it. “Your dad. You’ve turned into your father.”
“I…”
“You always hated him for what he did to your mom,” Chisa continues, her voice rising with every word. “Every time he cheated, every time he lied, every time your mom sat crying in the kitchen, you hated him. You swore you’d never be like him. That’s why you became a marriage counselor, isn’t it? To stop people like him from ruining their families.”
Your heart pounds as memories flood back—your mother’s tear-streaked face, Chisa’s arms wrapped around you as she whispered, It’s going to be okay, I've got you. But now…
Chisa’s voice drops, the anger giving way to something softer, sadder. “And yet, here you are. Sleeping with someone else’s fiancée. How do you think that makes me feel? Watching you become the very thing you hate most?”
You open your mouth to defend yourself but the truth lodges itself in your throat. The excuses you’ve told yourself—Heeseung and Sakura aren’t really in love, their relationship isn’t real, this is different—feel hollow without him here to hold you, to remind you that you aren’t a monster because even if the engagement wasn’t real, Sakura’s feelings for Heeseung are and you knew that, you knew and still went for it.
The thought grips you, your stomach twisting as guilt crashes over you like a tidal wave. You’re no better than your father.
“Chisa…” Your voice is barely above a whisper. “I didn’t mean—”
“Didn’t mean what? To hurt people? To betray the one person you were supposed to help? You think that makes it better?”
Tears blur your vision but you don’t bother wiping them away.
“I’m sorry,” you croak, the words tasting bitter on your tongue.
Chisa shakes her head. “Sorry doesn’t fix this. Sorry doesn’t undo what you’ve done. It doesn’t change the fact that you’re exactly like him.”
For a moment, you think she’s going to leave but she lingers in the doorway, her gaze softening just enough to twist the knife.
“He’s not a good person,” she says finally, her voice quiet but firm. “And neither are you, if you keep letting him drag you down.”
The door clicks shut behind her, leaving you alone in the suffocating silence. The room feels colder after Chisa leaves. Her words play on a loop in your head, relentless and unforgiving.
“You’ve turned into him.”
“You’re exactly like him.”
You press your palms to your eyes, trying to block out the memory but it’s no use. It claws at you.
Chisa had been there for all of it—every fight, every slammed door, every tear your mother cried. She’d been the one who stayed up with you in your room, distracting you with dumb jokes and snack runs when the shouting downstairs became too much. She was the one who held you when you sobbed after catching your father’s texts to another woman, promising you that you’d never have to deal with anything like that when you were older.
Not your sister.
She had her own way of dealing with it. When things got bad, she’d leave, disappearing for days at a time. Spending nights at friends’ houses, coming back only when she couldn’t avoid it anymore. Then she left altogether—first for college, then for her own life, far away from the wreckage of your family.
Chisa stayed.
She was more of a sister to you than your actual sister ever was. She sat through the storm with you soaked in the same despair and somehow managed to hold you together when you thought you might break apart.
And now, after everything, you’ve betrayed her.
The irony tastes bitter, twisting in your gut like a knife. You didn’t just become the thing you despised; you became the thing that broke your family.
Your phone buzzes again from where it lies abandoned on the floor. You glance at it, reluctant to pick it up but the notifications don’t stop. They come in rapid succession, each one a reminder of how far this has spiraled out of control.
Your hands shake as you reach for it, curiosity overriding the gnawing dread. The screen lights up, showing messages from people you haven’t spoken to in years—college acquaintances, coworkers, even distant family.
You clutch the phone tighter, staring at the screen without seeing it. it’s all too much. Finally, you set the phone aside and pull your knees to your chest.
You don’t cry.
Instead, you sit there in silence, replaying everything in your mind. The choice to be with Heeseung, your night spent tangled in his arms, the way he looked at you like you were the only person in the world. You don’t regret any of it—not the moments you shared, not the feelings that grew despite everything stacked against you. What you feel for him is real and that’s something no headline or scandal can take away.
But you also can’t ignore the fallout. Your career lies in ruins, Chisa, your best friend—your sister in every sense of the word wants nothing to do with you and the trust you’d spent years building with her is gone. You’ve lost her and the weight of that is unbearable.
The word temptation floats to the surface of your mind. It’s what started all of this, isn’t it? The pull of something you can’t have, the magnetic force of wanting someone you weren’t meant to want.
You don’t regret Heeseung but you do regret everything it’s cost you. Temptation led you here. Desire kept you here.
And for the first time, you’re not sure how to fix it.
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Do you have any advice on how to write Dirk and Hal or know of anyone I could get tips from :0?
okay so first of all i want to say that i don't think that i'm really an 'authority' on the subject, or that anyone else really can be aside from andrew herself. but i do have some thoughts and opinions that i'm willing to share
#1 piece of advice is to reread the comic once in a while. or at least reread bits and pieces if that's too daunting or not feasible. the POV cam extension is really helpful for that because you can specifically reread just the parts where dirk is there (does not work for hal though iirc which is where the dialogue directory is the next best thing) anyway i suggest doing this because it's always better to have their canon depictions fresh in your mind so you aren't accidentally working off of purely fanon ones
i think this is more of just a writing tip in general but try to think about how much you intend to transform the character. and by that i mean how much you want to stick to canon characterization. no matter how far you go with it, your depiction should always be informed by canon, but you can go as far with it as you want as long as it's intentional. so for example, if you want to stay really close to canon characterization, go for it. but if you want to stick them in an AU, ask yourself how that will change their behavior, personalities, etc. and it you specifically want them to act differently than they do in canon, that's okay too as long as you justify it and make it believable to your reader. you don't have to be afraid of changing them as long as something happened to cause that change
i feel like these are the two biggest pitfalls people fall into, usually a combination of the two. either they just don't understand the character well enough to give a believable portrayal of them, they don't give the audience enough reason to believe their portrayal of them, or both. for example there are a lot of hal fics out there where he is evil and kills people for fun, which to me just tells me that the author didn't really get him. but the takeaway isn't that you should never make hal evil and kill people, just that you need to provide basis for the audience to believe that he would be evil and kill people while still feeling in-character for doing so. that's what i mean by intentionality, you need to understand why you make the artistic choices that you are making
i wrote down some common tropes (?) of hal writing i tend to see that are along the lines of "i see these a lot and they wouldn't be bad if the author just made them feel believable" if that's at all helpful. i can do some for dirk as well if anyone wants me to
3. avoid being reactionary. the homestuck fandom is so reactionary with its portrayal of characters, meaning that one mischaracterization will get popular, and people will complain about it and swing the complete opposite direction, leading to a different mischaracterization becoming popular. an example of this is everyone thinking dirk is the coolest ever, and then switching to think he's the lamest ever. just try to focus on your own perceptions of the characters based on what you read from the comic and what you agree with others on, don't form perceptions based on trying to break away from something else
4. this goes more for dirk than hal because hal isn't as popular, but just keep in mind that dirk isn't the main character. i think a lot of people attribute main character energy to him when they don't really have to. obviously if you write a fic about dirk, he's literally going to be the main character, or if he's your favorite character you're going to care about him more than the others. but that doesn't mean he's any more important, more special, more traumatized, more mentally ill, or what have you, than any other character. going back to the example from above, the people who treat him as both the coolest OR the saddest character are both portraying him as the Special Boy. when the reality is that they are all pretty special and he's not an exception
i hope that all made sense... if not feel free to ask and i can explain further if needed
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I always wondered what would be Blister's rule should she have won the succession war, and although given all context about her, I guess the best we could extrapolate is a bigger version of what she was already doing, seeding mistrust among her subordinates, manipulating the masses and assassinating potential troublemakers every once in a while.
So far so good, but too typical dictatorship stuff for my tastes, so I decided to try to imagine a simple idea for an original Blister leadership in wof, mixing a bit of my AU ideas I have used and reused from time to time about her, so there comes the Savage State.
Blister is an occultist character, believer of powers greater than herself, but at the same time obsessed with her own divinity. She rather leads a cult of followers with obscure practices through the succession war, founded by one principle, the natural savagery of dragonkind and the liberation of its best potentials. She for long observed and 'studied' her own sister Burn, a 'specimen' she considered most fascinating, the muscular physical, the best of dragonkind, yet her brain somehow hadn't shrunk, at least not totally, she would be the ideal slave in Blister's world, she would only pity she hadn't hatched before Burn.
Blister also had some other experiences with dragons that through the years solidified her beliefs, like queen Coral.
The savage state consists of the queen, Blister, and her slave caste, everyone else. To begin such state, the first order of the day, the complete annihilation of writings, historical records and scrolls, petty things the commoner doesn't need to use, at least not yet.
The second order, the annihilation of education. Schools, orphanages and wingeries would be destroyed, an uneducated youth, a savage adulthood, goals to be pursued by the Blister regime, for she doesn't need thinkers, but brute muscles. Blister predicted in two generations time, dragons would revert most of their society into primitivity, the perfect state.
As far as things go, Blister is just repeating some steps of my AU Wasp, which honestly would make Blister blush with her evil.
Once her destruction of history, education and free thought was completed, Blister would rule without fear, for no one would have the free thought or will to challenge her at all, she would revert dragon society to the earliest years of post-Scorching, where legendary queens led dragons with status of goddesses, a thing Blister is particularly fond of becoming.
Her great experiment however, wouldn't be limited to the SandWings, but spread over all of Pyrrhia, queendom by queendom. Her favorite target were the MudWings, a tribe already considered lesser brutes by the others, which would become her main source of slave force and soldiers,
The next were the SeaWings, in her stay there, Blister learned quite a lot about propaganda, for no one ran a better propaganda machine than Coral, one of the first mass adapters of mass literature and media for the common folk. Of course, a mass of uneducated slaves was useless for her long-term projects, so the SeaWings were to become her more skilled slave force.
A place would be found for each of the tribes, which would come together to form her greater empire, Blistralia XD, or Aridia, as a better term, an ancient and often known name of the Arid Queendom, the first SandWing state in history, led by the queen of same name, Arid.
So it was it, mixing Blister's cunning, manipulation and superiority complex, to shape a true dystopia. Next time I gonna write about canon Burn's improved rule and Blaze's.
#dragon#digital art#au#blister#character#design#dragoness#queen#wof#wings of fire#wof au#art#queen blister#wofart#princess blister#wof blister#blister wof#blister wings of fire#blister WoF fanart#simplegeneraldraws
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Follow up to this which was inspired by the Kiramman banners because obviously I started thinking about what other angsty object inspired things I could come up with.
Vi's necklace. The answer is Vi's necklace that she wore on the bridge in S1 and we only see on Powder in the AU in s2.
Also on ao3
The door closes softly and Vi cranes her neck to watch Caitlyn come in.
She looks awful.
Immediately Vi recoils at the thought. Whether it’s true or not doesn’t matter. It’s the way Caitlyn thinks about herself and Vi purposefully tries to keep the thought out of her head. Tired, exhausted, broken-down. Those fit better as Caitlyn rests her head against the door for a brief moment. That’s all she will allow herself most days. A brief press of her forehead to the wood, a single sharp breath, then she straightens up and looks for Vi. It’s such a nauseatingly robotic routine it makes Vi wonder how many years she’s been doing it for. Not the ‘looking for Vi’ part, she’s got a date on that. But the momentary respite before straitening up, Vi wonders how long that has been going on. At first Vi chalked her skittishness in the room up to her sister, but as time has gone on she’s starting to think some part of Caitlyn has never been able to relax outside of the four posters of her bed. Their eyes lock and emotion bubbles across Caitlyn’s face.
It’s a practiced lie.
Vi wonders how they have become so obvious. Maybe she just wasn’t ready to see them before. It’s a hard thought to stomach, but she’s grateful she can see them now. Caitlyn approaches the bed but then decides to walk around it to stand on the side. She even denies herself that comfort, though Vi knows damn well she loves laying on the bed with her. The weariness seems worse than usual. She’s torn between asking for more information and just letting Caitlyn rest without having to relieve anything, but Caitlyn makes the decision for her. She offers only a quick smile in greeting and slips off her eye patch and earrings before retreating to the bathroom. Vi hears the shower rushing. It’s been a long day, she knows Caitlyn is fading even if she’s holding it together. Vi pushes herself up nudges the bathroom door open a little, just enough so Caitlyn can hear her humming. Every so often she hears the water change as Caitlyn steps out to check. Like Jinx is going to materialize and kidnap her again. Vi misses her sister so much, most days it feels like she would cut her arm off to see her again.
But she would never let her into this room.
It’s weird to hold the two thoughts in the same place. I miss you, but I’m angry. I’d do anything to see you, but I’m scared of what I’d say. I love you, but I’ll protect her. A lot of the time it’s a knot she doesn’t know how to untangle. How do you know someone loved you enough to let you go but didn't think you would be broken by their actions? When she got to a point where the truth settled, the betrayal she felt was crippling. Even the poisonous voice that whispered she had left Jinx was silent for once. The thought still makes her nauseous if she thinks about it too long. Her reaction is still visceral. So she focuses instead on the humming until the shower turns off. The next step is her getting up and doing whatever she can to move about the room. Caitlyn cannot bear to come out to see her sitting there humming, even though they both know she would do it for hours. Then there’s questions of soreness, does she need tea for her throat—things Vi doesn’t want Caitlyn to think about. Not when she should be doing anything else. She can’t begrudge Caitlyn’s occasional bout of nervous energy right after a shower, but she doesn’t want to be in its path.
Caitlyn finally emerges in her pajamas and bathrobe and smiles at Vi. This time with a hint of exhaustion.
“Hey,” Vi says, “wanna talk about it?”
“No,” Caitlyn says and sighs gratefully when Vi nods, “thank you.”
“Come on,” Vi says, ignoring the thanks. Like Caitlyn has to thank her for not interrogating something she doesn’t want to talk about. She tugs Caitlyn over to the bed, “sit.”
Caitlyn has been on eggshells all week and Vi can’t blame her. Even though she thought they were good, the conversation about how much Caitlyn helped her during their time apart is still weighing on her. She won’t say that’s what it is, but she doesn’t have to. The number of check ins and offered explanations about literally everything are starting to drive Vi crazy. She can tell Caitlyn feels like she kept some devastating secret. Like she betrayed Vi again. And Vi has no idea how to make her see how incredibly dumb that is. Caitlyn one of the smartest people Vi has ever met, but sometimes she gets wed to an idea and no matter how wrong it is, changing her mind becomes a herculean task. One Vi hasn’t quite figured out yet. ‘I betrayed you’ isn’t as bad as ‘I’m going to hunt down your sister’ but the desperate, exhausted look on Caitlyn’s face is eerily similar.
It’s not a look Vi ever wanted to see when Caitlyn thought of her.
Still, Caitlyn lets her steer her to the bed and sits when Vi nudges her to her side. She’s always home earlier these days and she likes to lay on Caitlyn’s side of the bed. At first because it smelled like her, but then she learned Caitlyn that too. And the only thing she seemed to like better was when her side of the bed smelled like Vi and was warm. It’s a stupidly simple task, one that literally only requires Vi to lay there, but it makes Caitlyn lay down a bit easier. Helps her relax a bit. So Vi always tries to time it so she’s made sure her side of the bed is warm. She doesn’t know why it makes her feel equally warm when Caitlyn lays back and lets the false emotions fall away, but it does. Every single time.
“Hang on, I gotta brush my teeth,” Vi says, fighting the urge to smile as Caitlyn’s lips come close to pouting, “one sec.”
“It should take longer than that,” Caitlyn says with a half yawn, turning to the side, “but not too long.”
Vi brushes her shoulder and makes her way to the bathroom. It’s a little adorable how it now slips out more freely how worried Caitlyn is about her ability to take care of herself. Like a cork has been pulled from a bottle. She has no idea how it took her so long to put together that Caitlyn had been looking out for her when she was in the Pits. The suspicion had been growing. It was kind of hard for it not to when she started recognizing things as soon as she started paying attention. She had been drunk a lot, but not the kind of drunk where you didn’t recognize familiar items. Weirdly it had started with her first period after the war. Caitlyn kept stuff in the cabinet above the toilet and when Vi had dug around, she realized the boxes were slightly different. The label had changed and weirdly she recognized the newer version. No-one threw out new products like that. Then there had been the chocolate bars. The way Caitlyn sometimes folded her napkin and tucked it into the cup when they went out for coffee. Really the antiseptic bottle had been the last straw. And it had still taken her a few days to work up the courage to voice the question. She wasn’t sure she was ready for the answer.
Caitlyn cared.
Simple as that.
Vi cleans her teeth with the familiar toothpaste and listens as Caitlyn shifts her weight and rolls onto her side. Vi listens as the sounds go quiet and spits into the sink. She cleans her mouth out quickly and just catches the sound of Caitlyn’s hand moving from underneath the pillow. She hears her sitting up and turning the box over in her hands. It’s one of hers, but it had been empty. Vi turns the water off and steps out of the bathroom. Caitlyn is sitting up in bed looking at the small velvet box with a curious expression. Her gaze lifts to Vi who folds her arms and dips her head towards it. Instead of softening, Caitlyn’s frown deepens. Vi can imagine her running down a list of things that could be in the box. She imagines her feelings of guilt that Vi got her anything and then annoyance that she felt guilty. It’s a loop Caitlyn seems endlessly caught in. Her eye darts from Vi to the box one final time. Vi watches her face fall momentarily before she holds the box in one hand and lifts the top with the other.
The shock on her face shuts the spiral down.
She goes pale with surprise as she looks at the contents. Her throat works and Vi watches her remaining eye fill. Vi has no illusions she’s out of that guilty spiral. But even she can’t think of a way to refuse this. Her fingers tighten around the box as her other hand comes to support it. Vi can see the white knuckled grip she has on the velvet. Even though the real treasure is what’s inside, she refuses to touch it. Vi hovers between giving her space or going over, but her feet are already caring her over. By the time she makes it to the bed Caitlyn’s brought her legs up and her knees are under her hands. All four limbs supporting one silly little box. All because she knows how precious the thing inside it is. When Vi sits, her tear filled gaze locks onto hers.
“I can’t accept this,” she whispers.
“Well it’s yours,” Vi says, “you can do whatever you want.”
“No,” Caitlyn shakes her head and quickly swipes at her cheeks before both hands go back to the box, “Vi, I can’t—“ she looks down and her eye presses shut, “if this is because of what I did—“
“Kind of,” she cuts in, just to see if Caitlyn will look annoyed but she gets no such look, “but not in the way you think.”
She barely has to touch inside the box for half the thing to spill out, even though it was the biggest one she could find.
But all of Caitlyn’s jewelry is on dainty little chains.
Her necklace is leather.
The leather is freshly conditioned and is almost as brown as the wood of the dressing screen. She polished the beaten metal and shined the glass. It manages to catch the light of the fire as she slides the metal caps and makes the loop long. Caitlyn watches each motion as her toes curl under the sheets. One of her hands curls in it too and Vi vaguely wonders if she’s going to try and nudge her off the bed. But Vi just dangles the long loop from her fingertips and holds the necklace between them.
“My mom gave this to me when I was a kid,” she says, “she had one too, I wanted one so badly—“ she smiles at the memory of the pure excitement, “before Silco this was the Eye of Zaun,” she explains, “it’s supposed to protect you from other’s evil intentions.”
Caitlyn listens and Vi sees her gaze going from her to the necklace and back again as it twists in the light.
“I didn’t wear it after she died because it became his symbol. And because I had my Dad,” she continues, “but it was always in my pocket, you know? Just in case.”
“Yes,” Caitlyn says wetly, “I know.”
“Course you do,” Vi says.
Caitlyn had been furious when she handed Vi new clothes. Furious to the point where it would have been funny if Vi hadn’t been so relieved to see her. After all, she had said she was going to get Vi’s things and vanished for a long time. Vi had been half sure she had changed her mind until she had appeared with clothes Vi had never seen before. They had been irrelevant, Vi would have walked out in her prison jumpsuit—hell she would have walked out naked if it got her out of the cell. When they left Caitlyn had given the Warden a look so venomous it had made even Vi swallow nervously. It was so venomous the Warden didn’t even think to smile at the fear on her face and that usually brought him endless amounts of delight. When she went to shove her hands into her pockets, her fingers hand connected with the necklace. Her only indication it was tied to the source of tension was when the Warden coughed and Caitlyn whipped her head around so fast and with such a look that he actually sunk down a bit in his chair and mumbled something that sounded like an apology.
Caitlyn got her necklace back though.
“My mom said it would ward off evil,” she repeats, “when I was a kid I thought that meant it would protect you from it,” she says, giving the leather a twist that makes the Eye rotate, “but I don’t think that’s what she was saying. It wards it off, but you need other people to protect you. And you protect them.”
She smiles at Caitlyn before she also starts crying.
“You protected me,” she continues, “even though I hurt you, even though you were mad at me, you still did it. I know you don’t think that’s a big deal but it is. It is to me,” she says, “I want you to have this so you remember you’re not alone. Even though I know you feel that way. You’re not.”
The tears break free but this time Caitlyn doesn’t wipe them away.
“Dirt under your nails,” Vi reminds her, futilely trying to keep them above the emotions. Caitlyn looks at her, “want me to say my arm’s getting tired?” She offers.
“No,” Caitlyn half sobs, “that’s not necessary.”
She leans forward and Vi realizes she’s giving her permission. Vi slips the leather over the back of her neck and pulls her hair free. She slides the clasps so the Eye rests just below the hollow of Caitlyn's throat. Her fingers brush the metal and Caitlyn’s hand comes up to touch it as well. Even though it’s nothing like the jewelry Vi has seen her wear, for some reason it immediately looks like it belongs there. Like it was always meant to find it’s way to her neck. Ever since she walked into that prison and brought Vi back to life. Their fingers find each others and slot together as Caitlyn leans forward and presses their foreheads together. Even amidst the anger some part of her had been desperate to do it in Ambessa’s tent. Prevented only by handcuffs and a thousand other reasons. The second she got Caitlyn away, the second Caitlyn came into another cell and brought Vi back to life again, all Vi wanted to do was be close. To know she was never going to have cuffs or bars keep her from touching Caitlyn again.
Caitlyn makes a sound she tries to muffle and Vi can tell it’s not a good one. Caitlyn clamps her lips together but Vi isn’t fooled. She doesn’t give a shit if the necklace makes her cry. She actually kind of prefers it. Crying means Caitlyn feels safe enough to do it. Safe and not judged, which is what Vi wants. She trades the press of their foreheads to pull Caitlyn into her shoulder and wrap her arms around her, slipping one hand underneath the collar of her pajama shirt. This time only one of Caitlyn’s arms comes up around her back, but that’s okay. Vi can feel the other between them wrapped tightly around the Eye.
Later in the glow of the fire, Caitlyn twists the Eye around with her fingers, her eyes staring upwards as her head rests on Vi’s chest.
“I think she’s going to give up the Seat,” she whispers to Vi, “she said this was futile—“ Vi raises her eyebrows, “wasting her time,” Caitlyn sighs, “wasting her fucking time with my Piltie bullshit.”
Vi strokes through her hair as Caitlyn continues.
“It was my mother’s Seat,” she continues, “I wanted it to be used for good.”
Vi nods but Caitlyn can read through her silence and glances up at her, dislodging Vi’s hand. Vi catches her gaze and looks towards the Eye and sighs.
“Cait that seat should be yours,” she says.
Caitlyn’s eye widens as she looks up at Vi.
“What?”
“You shouldn’t have given it up,” she says again, with a bit more confidence. Caitlyn is still staring at her, “Cait no-one can do more good with that seat than you."
Caitlyn looks down but she doesn’t immediately object to what Vi has said. It might be the first compliment that she’s tentatively accepted without it nearly becoming a fight between them. That alone makes hope start to burn in Vi’s chest. Caitlyn keeps fiddling with the necklace as she considers. She doesn’t say yes or no, but she does nudge closer against Vi’s chest to find a slightly more comfortable spot. And when she does finally drift off, her fingers remain around the necklace for a while before curling into Vi’s tank. While the feel of Caitlyn’s steady breathing usually lulls Vi into sleep, tonight she lingers in the haze of something close to pride. It’s been nice to just have this time to not fight for every breath. But there’s been a growing thought in the back of her head if she can still help. What helping looks like. What it feels like.
It feels kind of like coming home.
And for the first time, it doesn’t feel like she's doing it alone.
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Saw a post about how you need to read original fiction and not just fic to write books, and I had some thoughts but they're not so much a direct response so I figured I'd make my own post ...
You do need to be conversant with original fiction to write it, but also - that doesn't mean that your fiction diet as you write needs to be primarily original fiction. If you want to write a book, you've probably spent a lot of your life reading original fiction even if you're in fandom now. That all counts. (Assuming what you want to write bears at least some resemblance to what you've read.)
Fanfiction really doesn't teach you to develop characters and settings on your own, it's true. It particularly lets you be lazy about not describing them physically, and not having to do any work for walk-on characters who exist in canon. You also can get used to writing romantic short stories that would be completely unmarketable if they were not fic.
However, fanfiction still can teach you a lot of transferable skills, if you want it to. You can write novels to stretch your ability to plot a longform story and follow through on 60k+ words. You can consciously work to improve your prose, your pacing, and/or your physical/emotional descriptions no matter what your subject matter. You can write a story that focuses on how a character changes and develops, and you can focus on a minor character from canon and do the work to make them three-dimensional. If you're into AUs, you can also work on worldbuilding or writing a believable historical setting. Literally the only thing you don't really have the opportunity to do is create your own main characters from scratch.
And I feel like that's actually the easiest part of writing. Sitting down and writing a story that lasts over 80k words or so, is compelling all the way through, has defined character arcs, etc. is way harder than making up the initial concept. If you're in fandom, you clearly Do Stories whether they're on the paper or onscreen, and so you probably have a lot of character types in your head already to start messing around with.
There was also a point in the post about how if you don't read you're not going to understand where your story fits genre-wise, and you're probably going to think that it's new and genre-breaking when it isn't - and that leads me to two thoughts. One is that not feeling able to place your own story if it crosses genres might be more common to writers than you think: it just came up in a Bestseller Experiment podcast ep I listened to the other day as a normal thing due to the writer being too close to their story. I have good comps for my novel (there's a T. Kingfisher that is incredibly similar in concept and key characters) and I still feel like "oooh ... is it more fantasy or more historical ..."
The other is that fic makes it so you're more likely to actually write something that genuinely doesn't quite fit in the boxes. That's something I've been thinking about since Winter's Orbit. That book, if you don't know, was originally written on fail_fandomanon's spinoff writing meme and posted on AO3. It was always original fiction, but it has a fic-like sensibility: there's a strong political intrigue plot alongside a strong queer romance plot between a playboy who's not really a playboy and a smol bean with trauma. If you read the GoodReads reviews from when it was published, you can find many sf fans complaining that the romance takes up too much space and romance fans complaining that there's too much plot outside the romance. I think now with the rise of "romantasy" there's more tolerance for that, but that label feels like it's getting less useful as it broadens to mean "fiction written by a woman that includes a romance" (and it feels very m/f to me but we don't have time for that now). Because so much of ficwriting fandom focuses on stories that heavily foreground romance but don't hit the traditional romance beats and also writing the characters figuring out who's committing industrial espionage or whatever. In a romance novel, the romance is absolutely the A plot and the whatever is very much B plot (if not somehow C). In sf/f and thrillers, the whatever is the A plot and the romance is around the edges. Fic teaches us to do them both equally, because the point of the story is to see the characters getting together (often not like canon, when it comes to m/m and f/f) while having a plot to deal with (like they have in canon). Also, in a lot of cases of genre-mixing, determining which one it "counts as" is really determining which one it will sell better under, and that's not something a person outside of the industry can generally tell, regardless of what they're reading on their own.
#writing#fandom#I'll come back to the romantasy thing at some point#it's dicey because it requires me to talk about the romance genre and people get really mad about saying you don't love it
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In love with the Wolf
Alpha!Jinx x Fem!Reader
This fic takes place in Omegaverse AU. Mentions of smut, blood, werewolves, violence, angst
This fic is also taking place in another world but with Arcane characters. A Fanfiction written by me. I don’t own any of the characters. Using (Y/N) in this fic as well for Reader.
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@elle-girlylesbian
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Part 1 https://www.tumblr.com/insomniadreamzz/771753708121931776/in-love-with-the-wolf
Part2
„Aren‘t you going to eat anything? I thought wolves are more the type of eating a lot and not starving themselves?“ The guard was clearly mocking Jinx, gaining a annoyed glare from her. „Fuck you.“ She said before getting up on her feet, getting close to the metal rods of her cell.
„You have no idea who you arrested do you? There is a reason why everyone is scared of me…wanna see why?“ Jinx was done pretending she couldn’t do anything about her current situation, she was indeed stronger than any other wolf if she wanted to. Her sadness about her life situation made her feel weak for a couple of days being locked up in that cell, her will to live and fight faded but it got back the second she met you. A human who believed in her and that made her feel at least a bit more confident. She wanted to find you. She needed to. Last time you talked to her, she could sense you were special to her. Something she didn’t feel towards any omega, it was interesting and also thrilling that a human could awake this feelings in her, she needed to discover more of it.
„This behavior won’t take you anywhere.“ The man said, crossing his arms as a disgusting grin plastered his face. Jinx eyes started glowing pink as her rage only got bigger and she managed to bend the metal rods just enough so she could slip through them in a inhuman speed, the human couldn’t even react fast enough before he could feel her claws digging into his flesh, a low growl escaping her lips. „I think it will…your mistake of underestimating me will take you nowhere…“ She whispered before ending his life, blood splattered on the floor and walls before she then made her way to escape prison, making sure no one else would see her. Thank god she was good at sneaking out of places.
You were laying on your bed, currently reading a book, making yourself cozy with having your sleeping clothes on which was a top with the matching shorts. Your silence got interrupted by some noise coming from your window, first you ignored it, thinking it might be just the wind but when you looked towards the window, seeing pink eyes staring at you, you first almost got a heart attack before putting your book away and immediately rushed towards your window, opening it. „Jinx?!“ You asked and she ignored you first, getting into your bedroom as she slipped past you through the window. „Yep! That’s me.“
You quickly closed the window, better not questioning her how the hell she got up here as you turned, seeing how she already made herself comfortable in your bed as if it was her own home. „How-…“ You started but she cut you off. „Don’t ask. I made it to you. How? Not your business. I thought about your words yes but I also don’t want to be locked up for years.“ In fact she needed you, taking in your scent again that made her so curious for you.
Knowing that Jinx could be very dangerous you decided not to annoy her with any more questions. Of course you got a little scared of her because she definitely didn’t made it out of prison by asking nicely. You knew how it was protected and could only guess the massacre she caused. You didn’t want to be the next victim so you just didn’t question her…for now. „Uh fine then make yourself comfortable…“ You said, she grinned widely at you before she did what you just told her, taking off her pants as she wanted to stay in her boxers, noticing your surprised look.
„What? I am an alpha if you didn’t understand that yet. Stop staring at my bulge or are you horny?“ She really had no filter, her mouth just saying what she thought. The blush on your face showed your embarrassment before you shook your head quickly. „N-No! I am not!“ You defend yourself before slipping into bed again beside her but you kept your space from her just in case, turning so your back was facing her.
Silence filled up the room again, you hoped Jinx was just asleep by now as some time passed but you could feel her gaze on you. It was hard staying calm beside such a stunning woman, every time you closed your eyes you pictured kissing her and even doing more. Your naughty thoughts couldn’t be controlled as you felt her breath on the back of your neck. She did shift closer to you. There was no way Jinx couldn’t sense your excitement, your legs rubbing against each other every now and then, trying not to touch yourself, your breath hitching when you felt her arm sneaking around your waist.
„What are you doing?“ You asked, trying to sound annoyed but your voice was shaky, already telling her you were definitely having naughty thoughts. „Come on toots did you forget I am a wolf? I can sense everything…“ She whispered with a seductive tone, she liked teasing you and you hated it and loved it at the same time. You were supposed to arrest her again, it was your job but somehow you couldn’t. The way she looked so sad and depressed the last time you saw her, it broke your heart and you got to the thought that she was just a living being like you, with emotions. Also her attractiveness had you already wrapped around her finger the first time you saw her.
„You don’t know me at all…be happy I am tolerating you here…and ignore that you went against the law because-…“ You stopped, almost revealing that you liked her. She knew you did but she wanted to hear it from you. „Because what?“ Jinx asked as her hand went dangerously close to your crotch, making you bite your lower lip hard. „N-Nothing…“ You mumbled, making her feel a bit frustrated about your stubbornness.
„So is that nothing?…“ Her hand slipped unter your shorts, feeling the wet stain on your panties as she brushed her finger over it, making you gasp in surprise. Your heart beating fast. „Your body is telling me the truth if your mouth can’t.“ Jinx was right, you just wanted her. It was hard to admit because you barely knew her but you just felt different around her or maybe your dirty mind was just taking over. Your heart could never deny a beautiful woman and Jinx was just gorgeous.
She didn’t even plan on stopping to go further, removing your shorts and panties with a swift movement, not wanting to waste any more time, the smell of your arousal making her cock hard as it pressed against your ass. „Damn…you really are a dirty girl…I don’t mind it though.“ Her words drove you crazy, she really knew what effect she had on you, her finger toying with your clit, sending shivers through your body. „S-Shut up and fuck me.“ You finally gave in, making her grin before her lips found your neck, making you sigh in pleasure before a moan escaped your lips as she slipped her finger inside of you, gently thrusting it inside of you. „Good girl…“ She told you, somehow her words made you more horny, you felt her bulge pressing more against you as you pressed yourself more back against her.
Her free hand pushed her boxers down to let her cock free, slipping it between your thighs as she rubbed it between them, giving herself some pleasure as well while she still fucked you with her fingers. The sight of her cock peeking out between your thighs only turned you on even more. „Ah fuck…you want more baby mh?“ She cooed close to your ear, again giving you shivers down your spine as you felt her hot breath against your skin. „M-Mhh…y-yes I do.“ You managed to answer between your gasps, moaning out as you felt her sliding inside of you after removing her fingers, lifting up your leg a little to have better access. Your eyes rolling back at the intense feeling of her filling you up so good.
„That’s my girl…take my cock.“ She cooed before biting your earlobe, starting to thrust inside of you, making both of you a moaning mess. Her thrusts becoming harder and faster, wet sounds of your dripping cunt filling up your bedroom. Her grip on you tightening as she felt you clenching around her, knowing you‘re going to cum any second so she sped up more, going harder on you, making you whimper at every hard thrust. „Ah! Ah fuck! I am so close.“ You mumble, biting down on your lip as you try not to be too loud but Jinx didn’t mind, she loved hearing you.
„Yes…good girl…cum for me.“ She encouraged you and her words were enough to make you reach your orgasm, body twitching at the intense feeling as you came on her cock. She kept on thrusting inside of you, letting you ride out your orgasm before she pulled out of you in time, making a mess on your thigh and tummy as she came as well. „Mhhnn…fuck…“
She kissed your neck and cheek, taking in your scent as both of you pant softly, slowly calming down from your high. Your scent was intoxicating, she loved everything about you. Jinx always thought it was impossible for her to be this addicted to a human but you just had a special effect on her. Both of you cuddling close until morning.
You woke up with Jinx still beside you. She looked so peaceful sleeping beside you, her long blue hair literally glowing because of the sun shining through your window. You smile before moving a little strand of hair behind her ear which was hanging over her face. A little groan leaving her lips as she shifted a little, her arms instinctively pulling you closer to her, making you blush a little. You literally fucked last night but you still felt a bit shy right now, cuddling into her chest as you closed your eyes again. „Good morning…“ You heard her say with a tired, low voice. „Good morning my wolfie.“ You said, making her smile, you couldn’t see it but you knew she liked it, feeling her hand caressing you. „Gimme a few more minutes…“ She mumbled before nuzzling into your hair and you had no problem with that, wanting to let this morning start off slow without any stress. It’s your free day after all.
To be continued
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I have this head canon that Asmodeus’ progeny have a sort of geas on their eyes. Not out of love for his children but more of a possessive/righteous sense of “you will Never collect my mark as a trophy”. Anyway, someone even touches the area around Magnus’ eyes with Ill intent and they are flambéd with hellfire and sent directly to edom. I also think that extreme emotional rage can trigger whatever fucking monster lurks in the parabatai bond (I mean let’s make use of that, that sounds like a fun plot device that was never used) so some ignoramouses kidnap Magnus one tries to go for his eyes and is fried and Alec gets there in time to see the attempt and turns rabidly feral. And moral of the story, it’s the only thing Alec and Asmodeus agree on, even if their reasons are different. Anyway, your John wick au made me remember this.
I know Asmodeus is super trash, but I have such a weakness for him being a good dad to Magnus. Or at least a protective dad, even if he is too selfish to let Magnus follow his own desires and would rather have him by his side in Edom. So even though Asmodeus is super trash, I still like the thought that he does hold genuine love for his son, even if it is twisted. So I definitely stand behind the protection eyes thing. Though they only really help if someone tries to remove his eyes while Magnus is still alive, if they kill him first and then remove the eyes, even if they still get vaporized, that wouldn't help Magnus a whole lot. BUT, it is still a protective measure, and making Magnus completely invincible would get boring quick, so I fully support the headcanon. The parabatai bond thing is interesting. I must admit, and a lot of fans will probably loudly and vehemently disagree with me, - but I'm not a fan of the whole parabatai thing. I have only seen the tv show for shadowhunters -, and I'm honestly not interested in the books after learning about some of the things that the books have that the show doesn't, - but from what I have seen of the parabatai bond in the show, it just doesn't seem worth it at all. We weren't shown how it is an advantage in a fight, only how it is a really bad disadvantage if your parabatai gets hurt and then you feel that pain too and then it's a two for one deal because both are then useless. The bond also didn't seem to inspire great loyalty, as it didn't keep Jace from going behind Alec's back early on, and it didn't keep Valentine from throwing his parabatai (Luke) to the literal wolves, and it just didn't appeal to me at all from the show's perspective. Nevertheless, I could get behind actual useful sideeffects of it like a berserker powerboost kinda thing if strong emotions get channeled through and then kinda wind themselves on repeat and reach ever greater heights and yes, I do absolutely adore the thought of Alec just seeing red and killing whatever he needs to to get Magnus safe, so I give many kudos to the bond beast monster hiding inside parabatai pairs. :-)
Also, how you doing? I hope you remember to drink enough water. Stay hydrated. And try to get enough sleep. It's important to fill your battery back up.
#magnus bane#alec lightwood#shadowhunters tv#malec#malec headcanons#ask#I love talking headcanons!#actual useful aspects of the parabatai bond#asmodeus being maybe not the trashiest father in history but he is still an absolute ass
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oh hey! i was reading a fic the other day where Wangji was once misspelled as Wangu. which leads me to: MDZS Pingu-style??? noot noot!
Do you think love can bloom on the sea ice?
#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#digital art#Club penguin#ask#I've drawn a lot of strange crossovers for MDZS but this one really takes it up a notch#I saw this ask and thought “yeah why not. I've been meaning to do style studies. Let's experiment.”#And the moment my pen hit my tablet I was struck by the need to make it even worse.#Perhaps I am just nostalgic for club penguin and pengu but I think there is something magical about them holding hands.#Anyways I think younger WWX would have loved club penguin. It's the joy of the minigames and hanging out with your friends online.#Lan Wangji could never get past the fact the 'Ask your parent/guardian!' part of registration.#Either because he knew Lan Qiren would have said no *or* because he asked once and got turned down.#Lan Xichen probably was like 'Hey I can help you with that :)' to which LWJ said no because that was breaking the rules.#But if I *had* to put wangxian in a club penguin AU? Yeah 1000% it's LWJ as a mod and WWX as a notorious (nootorious) griefer.#WWX would be trying to speed run how fast he can get banned or how much he can get away with.#Getting removed and returning over and over earns him the 'necromancer of CP' title in the community. Loathed by many.#Meanwhile LWJ is about to seriously consider doxxing this guy just to get him to stop making his volunteer hobby less of a nightmare.#Cue 10 years later. They meet up on the ice flow on the last day before the servers get shut down. They have a genuine heart to heart.#Three years later on Club Penguin rewritten: two grown men decide to relive their childhood one more time.#Fate draws them to the same server.#I ask again. Do you think love can bloom on the digital sea ice?
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Cross and Dream would be unstoppable. In a bad way. Those two are both overworking machines and Blue is so so tired of having to wrangle them into resting.
#utmv#undertale au#both of them have an awful mindset about work#they think they need to run themselves into the ground for it to be good#Dream because he thinks there's always things to be done#and Cross almost as a punishment to himself but also as a distraction#pushing his body further than it can go#and getting his brain to stop thinking altogether#can't think about how much of a fuckup you are if you can't think at all#I think If Cross were to become a more fixed part of the Star Sanses' lives then Blue would just have a lot more on his plate#I do think he already takes care of Dream somewhat#but Dream won't fight him too much on it#he's more reasonable#Cross is anything but helpful and reasonable#And then if Blue ends up confronting him that's just more reason for Cross to feel guilty#because he feels like he's wasting Blue's time who's been so nice and helpful and has welcomed him so easily and he's really sorry-#and Blue's just like 'bro. you're literally doing it again just stop'#and Blue just wishes this fucking guy would chill out.#he didn't have so many reservations about tearing AUs apart#anywayyy#fun thoughts#messy ones but y'know
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oh yeah before i forget cute mttpoly headcanon because i said so: when killer finds out (through SOME way of means. he has his ways) that dust and horror like something then at every chance he can he goes and finds that thing for them :3 because I SAID SO AND IT'S CUTE ‼️‼️ (something something killer has no idea how to properly show affection and appreciation after believing his whole life was meant to cause pain and suffering to those close to him and now that he's trying he does silly goofy stuff like this hehe,,,,,,, dust is DROWNING in piles of fluffy blankets and books. horror cannot keep up with eating the amount of snacks killer keeps stealing for him 😞😞😞)
#this was inspired by when parents do this to their kids after finding out they like one thing and buying that thing over and over#thank you untitled29876011111 for helping me figure this one out ‼️‼️‼️ wasnt quite sure of how i could justify this fluffest 💀💀#listen untitled29876011111 gave a fire reason as to how this wouldnt be incredibly ooc and weird but anyways#i haaaave to add onto it and make it sillier by suggesting that this isnt even a conscious thought#killer just sees something that one of then would like and hes like 'hey dust and horror would like that'#and for SOME reason his body's already walking into the shop looking at the thingy 😒😒😒 he didn't do that on purpose#but hey hes here now........... and then killer steals the thingy and causes a massive commotion#i need to get to writing my mtt fic so that i can actually put all these ideas to use#a lot of my ideas can work in the context of that fic i just havent written it 😒😒😒😒#at first killer just started giving the thingies to hrdt casually but then horror started pointing out the stupid amount of stuff he gave#and then killer was like wait is this not good???? uhhh what can he do.........#and then he started Upping the dramatic factor by getting cards and chocolates and flowers and stuff with the gifts#(horror hated it (he preferred the older way killer gave them gifts) but dust was flattered (and a bit embarrassed))#killer's just glad to have figured out yet another detail about hrdt 😈😈😈😈 time to add it to his always growing list of things about them#AUASGAUXHSJZHAH MTTPOLY SWEET CUTE FLUFFY MTTPOLY ARE SO FUCJING STUPID#i NEED to study and analyze killer so i can come up with more accurate stuff than what i already do heheheehehe#guys this isnt ooc at all trust 😒😒😒 untitled29876011111 approved it himself and CLEARLY his opinion is very very important and peak#anyways back to drawing shitty horrordust (i must shower and brush teeth hehe) perhaps i will actually get a full night's worth of rest :3#tricule hc#YEAH THIS IS A HC THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED IN MY HEAD TRUST THIS IS SOOOO THEMMMMMMM#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#murder time trio#mtt poly#murder time trio poly#utmv#sans au
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some more aa wof au stuff for cringetober day 3 (fandom au!!). ive been messing with my apollo for this au for way too long trying to come up with a design i liked so uh!! his design might change in the future if i end up doing more with this au idk.
bonus: young thalassa
#the first trucy note is shortened btw#the original note was 'is she a hybrid? is she albino? is she just weird? its not like im ever going to draw zak!'#anyways apollo doesnt realize he has nightwing abilities#does he even know hes half nightwing? he might have suspicions but its not like he knows his parents#anyways he probably thinks his bracelet is animus touched and thats how he has those abilities#<- (can you tell it was originally animus touched before i changed my mind on that. can you.)#i have a lot of thoughts about this au i need to do more with it#anyways they both take after their mom a lot i think. that was only semi intentional#i think when i was designing thalassa originally i wanted her to look like how i wanted to do apollo?#idk this thalassa design is actually pretty old#if youve been following me long enough to have seen the drawing shes from when it dropped uh. im sorry bgfrdbg#au#doodles#wings of fire#ace attorney#apollo justice#trucy wright#thalassa gramarye#nightwing#skywing#cringetober#cringetober 2024
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So this might seem like a weird question, and this IS going anonymously because of it BUT
How many characters in New Age would be able to describe the taste of human flesh.
I feel like with the provided backstory, Killer could be a candidate for it, and I wouldn't be surprised if Nim had some sort of whim at some point even though I'm pretty sure you said they were vegetarian but I could have hallucinated that or smth
You can very much ignore this if you feel uncomfortable with it, btw. I just find this interesting
Hi anon, this ask is unhinged abd I love it SO dearly, please feel free to send more if you get the urge 💖 this is actually something exciting I hadn't even thought about! So... let's see who all I can list off for this idea...
-> Killer. Like u said Anon, I think he IS the most likely candidate! I don't think that it's a meal he'd have eaten often, nor would he openly joke about it, but I think that somewhere like the Temple where he was raised, or on the streets after he left Chara (the Black Market wasn't picky-) would be where it happened.
-> Nim. Oh. Yeah. She would've, I'm sure. (Also tbf I have no idea if I said that or not, my memory is SO bad, I'd probably have to check w/ Ancha lol- but for this let's imagine she's not.) I don't think anyone would be able to convince her if she knew what it was up-front (she thinks humans are lesser, but kinda in the way ppl don't usually think of brown bears as a food source?) But she's definitely had it before. 'Exotic cuts' that she never bothered to fact check lmao. Fancy and expensive, so she bought them!
-> Dust. Now, this one is a little weird, but I have good reason! Dust has a reputation to uphold when he's a crime lord, and has to get along with leaders of other crime branches to keep his power AND keep the lines running. One of the other kingdoms (which I'm establishing is basically full of shape-shifters which eat human flesh) was a prime source of income for Dust because they had a LOT of animal meat they weren't harvesting. In meetings, well, sometimes the meal involved the dishes of that kingdom, so human flesh! (He will NOT admit it didn't taste bad.)
-> Fresh. And no, not for the reason he'd normally know lmao. I think that Fresh's connection with the beasts (which I now realize are kinda stand-ins for his furby collection-) leads some of then to bring him gifts! And he lives usually out in the wilderness so a hunt is a hunt, y'know? Monsters are off-limits but like. If the beast brings him *just* the meat? He takes his chances abd hopes it's not People. (Some of it is, and he knows it, he could definitely identify it if given to him 🙏)
-> Reaper. He's not proud of it anymore, but back in the day when he was the general? Bringer of Death? Yeah, he ate a guy once. Used it as a fear tactic against their enemies, which in his defense DID work. But he wouldn't do it again. He would recognize the taste tho!
Soooo..... 5 of the New Age characters would be able to describe the taste of human flesh! (At least for the main cast lol-)
I do have honorary mentions though.
-> Ink: Has bitten people enough to *probably* have an idea of the taste.
-> Geno: Tried to do it "for science" when he was in the academy working on decay magic. (He reversed the decay enough that the flesh was fresh, he was curious!) He was told that if he did they'd suspend him, so he missed his opportunity :(
-> Cross: Can't tell you about the taste of flesh, but human blood used to get into his mouth all the time when he worked in his old kingdom, so he could tell you about that instead!
#new age au#thank you so much for this ask this was genuinely so fun to think about!!!!#tags for more thoughts:#Horror may have been starving but his family are an extremely peaceful community and weren't anywhere close to wanting to resort to violence#characters like Dream + Blue are off the table (Dream probably suggested it once but Blue shut it down lol-) thanks to morals#Nightmare's squeamish and VERY particular about his food and Ccino turns away all suspiscious meat immediately#(and in childhood the twins ate different from their mother)#Error is a lot like Night abd is picky about his food#but he ALSO needs to eat a lot less often than normal monsters so the reason never arose#Ccino... had it rough. but if Human Meat was Nim's delicacy and Ccino barely ate as it was? he was NOT subjected to that horror lmao#i think that covers everyone I didn't mention in the post?#but snth I gotta highlight is that Geno is unhinged and Fresh picked that up from him. Geno is willing to do just about anything to prove#his proficiency in magic or learn smth new#and Fresh has been expected by his beasts to eat random berries and dead birds and junk for years and. he does. so if he has#plausible denianility with the flesh then whatever. not on him. lmao-#Killer isn't proud at all of his eating it because frankly he didn't want to do it. and Dust is the kinda guy to mention it in passing#and then not bring it up again lmao-#then ofc Reaper was a wild teen/young adult. because he aged slower his roaring twenties lasted half a century and eating people was the#more tame side of things. did it very eloquently tho lmao. very mindful. very chill. love him <3#okay I'll stop rambling now! this one was fun!!!!
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i made a rough timeline for the clone^2 au, just for my own convenience sake when dating things. some things might be out of order from the episode date, and thats also for my convenience.
September 3rd: Danny, age 14, has the accident in the lab that turns him liminal
September 10th: Danny is discharged from the hospital and given two weeks leave from school
September 24th: his sick leave ends, and Danny returns to school
October 14th: Danny sneaks into his parents' basement and releases the ghosts they have trapped in cages. Official birth of the vigilante, Phantom
November 27th: Danny fights Pariah Dark, and wins
December 24th: the Ghost Writer torments Danny
February 12th: Danny's 15th birthday
March 3rd: its been six months since Danny's accident
March 7th: Danny fights his evil future self
May 8th: Danny meets Ellie [age 15] and they become twins
December 14th: Danny finds out from his parents that he's a clone
February 12th: Danny's 16th birthday
Early-Mid April: Danny meets Damian [age 6] :)
Mid-Late April: Damian runs off for the first time, damages Danny's hands the first time
May: Damian runs off two more times in the span of three weeks, he damages Danny's hands both times.
Early June: Damian runs off one more time, damages Danny's hands again, resulting in permanent nerve damage.
Mid-Late June: Damian finally gives up on the League coming to get him and joins the Fenton Family.
July: Damian finally coaxes Danny into letting him come along with him on patrol: Wraith is born.
#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc#dpxdc crossover#clone^2#danny fenton is a clone#this only focuses on the earlier parts of the au because those are most important imo. figuring out when danny's accident was. when he#became phantom. when he met damian. etc. is all pretty important stuff and helps me figure out ages beyond '10 year gap'#not super important stuff to much anyone else i think but its nice to have it written down as reference#i usually put danny's accident as happening at the beginning of the school year. tis convenient that way#me: hmmm when do i make danny find out he's a clone. beginning of the school year makes the most sense right???#me:....or.... i could ruin his christmas again :)#thought about increasing the amount of times damian runs off but... thats a LOT of time he's run off and i didnt want to go overboard#same thing with danny's hands. thought about hurting him more frequently but honestly taking a blade to the hand is already damaging enough#on its own. catch a blade with his hands four times would be enough to cause permanent nerve damage and also he would have learned his#lesson if it happened more frequently.#so damian runs off 4 times in the span of essentially 2 months#and four times danny catches his blade. three times he got cut. one time he needed stitches#anyways thats the timeline for now. made totally for convenience sake and no other reason#totally dont look at my google docs there’s nothing there but half forgotten wips and cfau master doc
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looking at the dialogue i wrote up for the next comic strip and the sheer amount of sketches (sketches. not even the lineart itself) to go along with it........ at this point i may just have to start writing fanfiction. it would be a lot less tedious methinks
#of course that day is not today#but also. it would be so much easier to just connect the dialogue with narration instead of ten million pictures#unfortunately i am addicted to having The Visions and need to draw out every expression#as well as addicted to Not Ever Elaborating On Anything Besides What Is Required For The Comedic Situation Envisioned#and in fic form i feel like there will need to be a lot more elaborating. which i refuse to do#to the numerous people in my askbox yes i have seen them. thank you for sending me them#however i have decided to put way too much thought into fitting them within a larger narrative#which is why they're taking ten million years to answer#anything related to weredoc you have asked and you shall receive An Entire Chunk Of Story so you have that to look out for#in the next 7 business weeks. cheers#kit answer an art ask in a normal way challenge [impossible]#[also exactly why i am in this current situation LMAO.#this au is really the work of a collective because i have based every planned story beat directly off an ask#and also it was spawned because of one. wonderful world we live in]#kit yap session#weredoc au#ig. bc i am talking about it
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HOLY SHIT MARZENIE FINALLY
the long awaited one I keep talking about but not actually drawing is finally here
‘The pale maiden’
(aka the personification of Basil’s mother issues)
Elaboration below ⬇️ <3
The Pale Maiden is a reoccurring presence in Marzenie, she’s always around… somewhere, but when you get too close she disappears again, to get interactions with this entity you have to actively seek it out, if you find her in every location she’s present in you’ll find her one last time in the ‘Haunted House’ area where she will begin following you, there’s a very small door in the house that if you go through while she’s following you she will get stuck in, allowing you to initiate the boss battle
Killing The pale maiden is completely optional, there is no material reward, but if you do it after you try to exit the house instead of the door going outside it will show you a ‘memory’ of the day Basil’s parents left (<- again I’m using language as if Marzenie were an actual game but idk that’s just how of think of it), additionally it will stop snowing in Marzenie (there’s no benefit to this it’s just tjat thr visual snow stops, but considering this would be hypothetically very close to the end of the game it wouldn’t matter much, it’s just meant to signify that you’ve done something significant)
The Pale maiden isn’t very complex, it’s just a twisted representation of Basil’s mother (or more so her absence), there were a handful of inspirations here… I was thinking a lot about ‘the snow Queen’ when I had the idea for her, because in terms of how Marzenie itself works this entity is meant to be heavily connected to the cold itself (insert symbolism)— but that’s not what she’s based on in universe, in universe Basil is subconsciously connecting her to a story she read to him of the same name, because being read that story as a very young child is one of the only good memories Basil has of his mother (yikes!)
The actual story of “The pale Maiden” doesn’t have too much relevance, but that’s why her fingers are cut off in the design
I should mention that The pale maiden technically has two different designs because above her existing in Marzenie Basil also hallucinates a very similar entity in real life sections (which I’ve barely touched on at all but… speaking in game terms again, real life sections are a thing)
#omori!marzenie#omori au#Danny’sDrawings©️#I keep meaning to draw Charlene but I guess it’s Basil mom time first!#god… I need to name her#I guess I’ll go look at polish names ..?#oh my god I just realized I’ve literally never thought about what Basils grandma looks like in Marzenie#like.#I’ve considered Hallucinations related to her but for whatever reason I just haven’t been thinking about what form she’d take in marzenie??#I have a lot more work to do on this au then I thought hehehehe
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